Hey all,
Well, Dad wanted Ben and I to be able to post on his blog, to keep folks updated if/when he's in the hospital for surgery and unable to post. So, here's my first attempt....
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Some folks were curious as to my impressions of Dad while I was home. Well, its hard to analyze him objectively, since he is my Dad ;-), but I'll try. After the initial adjustment to his not having a beard anymore (DAD- you should post a new pic!), the main thing I noticed was him being very tired. But, on Chemo, that is to be expected. He is also now much thinner than I've ever seen him before, but I was expecting that. I am very glad he's on better pain meds, because the other stuff was obviously such a headache for him. Also, Ben (my brother) reminded me that I was there "at the worst" in terms of the chemo, and that, when he's not on chemo, he is quite "normal" ;-). I know that to be true, as well, from his posts and stuff. I went during "the worst" on purpose, so that was kind of expected as well. I admit I was a bit surprised by how loving and cuddly he is being with Ben's cats ;-)!! But, I know that's a good thing, too. Now, we just have to wait until after the PET scan on the 19th to learn what the plan is in terms of surgery.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It was very nice to be home and to see everybody. And thanks again to Dad (and now Ben as well) for letting me shack up at his/their place.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Let me know if there are any problems with this post, OK?
xoxoxo,
Amy
Friday, October 12, 2007
Thursday, October 11, 2007
Now I’m female?
Maybe you can explain it to me. These are the folks that are making decisions concerning my life. They write the reports, they read the reports, they make their decisions based on their reports.
My latest test results, a lower back x-ray, came back stating that I’m female! Are my hips really that wide?
Amy, we may have found that “disorder” we spoke of. Unfortunately, no one thought to tell me about it; I might actually have made a decision or two based on the information.
And another thing, when I went in to have my pump removed, I found that, unbeknownst to me, I had an appointment for the next day. I had to enquire as to the nature of the appointment, and no one seemed to know. They believed it was to give me a shot that they had given to me the same day they removed the pump the last time.
Now, I realize that I may not be feeling my best, and my new pain meds can cause “emotional mood disorders,” but help me out here. Am I to understand that I am supposed to meet Aurora’s schedule based on their whim? That I am not supposed to have scheduling problems; that I’m supposed to make myself available any time they schedule me? Even at the last minute?
This is customer service? I’m confused. Help me out here.
My latest test results, a lower back x-ray, came back stating that I’m female! Are my hips really that wide?
Amy, we may have found that “disorder” we spoke of. Unfortunately, no one thought to tell me about it; I might actually have made a decision or two based on the information.
And another thing, when I went in to have my pump removed, I found that, unbeknownst to me, I had an appointment for the next day. I had to enquire as to the nature of the appointment, and no one seemed to know. They believed it was to give me a shot that they had given to me the same day they removed the pump the last time.
Now, I realize that I may not be feeling my best, and my new pain meds can cause “emotional mood disorders,” but help me out here. Am I to understand that I am supposed to meet Aurora’s schedule based on their whim? That I am not supposed to have scheduling problems; that I’m supposed to make myself available any time they schedule me? Even at the last minute?
This is customer service? I’m confused. Help me out here.
Catching Up
It has been nice catching up with Amy, hearing about what’s up with her, and discussing issues about me. (It’s all about me, don’tcha’ know!) So we took up a bunch of time that I would have spent writing to you talking to her. Don’t hate her for it, OK?
AND, this round of chemo has taken its toll on me as well. My weight has gone from 197 on Thursday after the start of chemo to 174, a new low, this morning. But, with the edema and diuretics, it was expected.
Amy left Tuesday night and I went home and slept from 6PM to midnight, got a chance to talk to Ben for a couple of hours, slept again until 7AM, was up for less than 2 hours, and slept again until noon. Call it 14 hours of sleep.
While I was up and about, I started to feel lousy. Then the diarrhea kicked in. So, between that and the shakes, I figured that I might have to go back in to the VLCC.
Have I bragged on my kids lately? I didn’t mean to forget, so I’d like to take this opportunity to rectify the situation.
Ben, seeing how I looked, (this has to be hard on him, BTW) called into work, letting them know that he wouldn’t be in so he could take care of me if necessary. I didn’t ask; he just did it! I felt bad that he took off work, but I was glad that he did so. I do love my kids!
So, I called the VLCC and waited for over a half hour for a call back. I described what was going on and received some advice, with instructions to call back when and if things changed for the worse.
Here’s the fun part. Remember the issue I had with my diarrhea meds that I described in Late, but Still Today? I was given very specific verbal instructions on how to take the meds. When I received the meds, however, the written instructions were different. I started taking the meds that night, but called the VLCC the next day to clarify dosing instructions. Then I was told to follow the verbal instructions.
NOW, I’m being told to follow the label directions, not the very specific verbal instructions I had been given. Is that any way to run a clinic?
So, I took anti-diarrhea meds and crashed. Ben ran out and got a few things he needed including the first season of a TV series that he has had opportunity to catch. We watched the first four episodes.
Between the meds, the rest, and everything, by evening, I was feeling better. I ran off to bed about 10PM only to find that I couldn’t sleep most of the night. The same thing was happening the last time I had problems with diarrhea, so I’m guessing one S-FX (side effect) of that particular med is insomnia.
Anyway, I’m getting tired right now, so I think I’ll post this and try to take a nap. Maybe later….
AND, this round of chemo has taken its toll on me as well. My weight has gone from 197 on Thursday after the start of chemo to 174, a new low, this morning. But, with the edema and diuretics, it was expected.
Amy left Tuesday night and I went home and slept from 6PM to midnight, got a chance to talk to Ben for a couple of hours, slept again until 7AM, was up for less than 2 hours, and slept again until noon. Call it 14 hours of sleep.
While I was up and about, I started to feel lousy. Then the diarrhea kicked in. So, between that and the shakes, I figured that I might have to go back in to the VLCC.
Have I bragged on my kids lately? I didn’t mean to forget, so I’d like to take this opportunity to rectify the situation.
Ben, seeing how I looked, (this has to be hard on him, BTW) called into work, letting them know that he wouldn’t be in so he could take care of me if necessary. I didn’t ask; he just did it! I felt bad that he took off work, but I was glad that he did so. I do love my kids!
So, I called the VLCC and waited for over a half hour for a call back. I described what was going on and received some advice, with instructions to call back when and if things changed for the worse.
Here’s the fun part. Remember the issue I had with my diarrhea meds that I described in Late, but Still Today? I was given very specific verbal instructions on how to take the meds. When I received the meds, however, the written instructions were different. I started taking the meds that night, but called the VLCC the next day to clarify dosing instructions. Then I was told to follow the verbal instructions.
NOW, I’m being told to follow the label directions, not the very specific verbal instructions I had been given. Is that any way to run a clinic?
So, I took anti-diarrhea meds and crashed. Ben ran out and got a few things he needed including the first season of a TV series that he has had opportunity to catch. We watched the first four episodes.
Between the meds, the rest, and everything, by evening, I was feeling better. I ran off to bed about 10PM only to find that I couldn’t sleep most of the night. The same thing was happening the last time I had problems with diarrhea, so I’m guessing one S-FX (side effect) of that particular med is insomnia.
Anyway, I’m getting tired right now, so I think I’ll post this and try to take a nap. Maybe later….
“I Love It…
…when a plan comes together.” While never a fan of “The A-Team” that quote stuck in my mind earlier this past week.
I know, I missed several days of posting. And I hated to make good news wait. But I’m going to try to catch up here. So, if the tenses are a little wrong, please realize that I’m trying to edit this previously written post on the fly.
~~~~~~~~~~
During my last course of chemotherapy, I had had problems with keeping track of my liquid pain meds, so I asked the Cheerleading Squad for suggestions. The suggestions got sidetracked when I switched to the pill form of the medication, but the suggestions stayed in my mind.
My September 30 post, showed my new pill box that I obtained to handle the need to administer different meds at different times during the day. It was purchased large enough to handle the suggestions of using colored balls, or even M&Ms, to indicate my liquid meds.
With my oncologist’s flabbergasting decision to remove me from the Vicodin when I was concerned about the high, almost toxic, levels of acetaminophen and to substitute Aspirin as my pain meds, I had to start making some independent choices.
First, I went looking for an appointment with my Primary Care Physician.
Second, I made an effort to reduce the level of acetaminophen going into my system while maintaining the same level of hydrocodone by switching back to the elixir, the liquid form of my meds, for my two overnight doses.
So, out came the M&Ms again. I had made a “big bag” purchase of M&Ms from Wal Mart, 45 ozs for just under $7, to replenish my supply.
I took my 10:00PM dose the first night as liquid and set up the M&Ms for my 2:00AM dose. Amy and I stayed up until after 12:00AM talking, so I finally got to sleep by about 12:30AM. So, I was understandably tired when my alarm went off for my next dose. I remember the confusion I had when I opened the case and saw the brown and orange M&Ms. Then it came back to me. So, I took my liquid meds, and found that disposing of the M&Ms by eating them helped get rid of the awful taste of the meds in my mouth! Yeah! Later, I added a few more M&Ms to my pill box for just a little more bad taste eradication.
Over the course of the next few nights, I found that the system worked flawlessly! So, my special thanks to my cheerleading squad for the suggestions that came together to make my meds-taking experience both memorable and efficient! I couldn’t have done it without out your help!! It gets hard to think sometimes while sick, in pain, and the groggy feelings from lack of sleep that the drugs can cause.
So, thanks again for the suggestions!!!!!
BTW, apparently the elixir caused the gas problem I had!
~~~~~~~~~~
More good news, after finally getting past the layers of bureaucracy preventing a customer from accessing the services of doctor, which would have required me to wait for 3 weeks before seeing my doctor about my pain needs, I did obtain an appointment for Monday to discuss my situation with my PCP.
My oncologist, the doctor that didn’t want me to take Vitamin C because of the ascorbic acid it contained, wants me to take aspirin, which contains acetylsalicylic acid! As a non-steroidal anti-inflammatory drug, Aspirin can cause Adverse Drug Reactions (ADRs) especially in the gastrointestingal tract, read that as the STOMACH! You know, where I have a tumor sitting across the opening to the esophagus.
Amy and I did show up for my appointment. My doctor, as my PCP and rheumatologist, shared my view that NSAIDS were not in my best interests, stomach-wise, and put me on something stronger that should still protect my stomach.
Now, this is the point where my privacy and preservation instincts kick in.
In order to obtain my new pain meds, I had to sign a Medication Management Agreement detailing my responsibilities regarding my meds, my communications with my doctor, lab studies and random drug screenings, and what happens if I fail to comply with my agreement. I currently hold a Class A CDL (Commercial Driver’s License) and am already subject to the random drug screenings, so nothing will change in that regard.
Now, from all that info, you should be able to surmise that my meds might have a “street value.” And I don’t want some “street socialist” determining where I live from info on my blog and coming to visit me because he determined that his “need” was greater than my need. There is an entire section in my agreement describing the consequences of Lost or Stolen Medications; I LOSE! I get put in the same situation as my street socialist, by law. The only way I can then obtain relief is to do the same thing that my street socialist comrade did; steal it. Isn’t it great how laws work like that? The laws actually cause crime!
Now, most of you know me. Several of you have already experienced what happens when you show up at my door without any warning and at odd hours; I am prepared to defend myself. Now, more so than previously, I don’t have the energy to punch my way out of a wet paper bag. So, as a brand new member of the female, aged, or infirmed group, I keep a weapon handy. And I do know how, and am prepared, to use it.
I know, I missed several days of posting. And I hated to make good news wait. But I’m going to try to catch up here. So, if the tenses are a little wrong, please realize that I’m trying to edit this previously written post on the fly.
~~~~~~~~~~
During my last course of chemotherapy, I had had problems with keeping track of my liquid pain meds, so I asked the Cheerleading Squad for suggestions. The suggestions got sidetracked when I switched to the pill form of the medication, but the suggestions stayed in my mind.
My September 30 post, showed my new pill box that I obtained to handle the need to administer different meds at different times during the day. It was purchased large enough to handle the suggestions of using colored balls, or even M&Ms, to indicate my liquid meds.
With my oncologist’s flabbergasting decision to remove me from the Vicodin when I was concerned about the high, almost toxic, levels of acetaminophen and to substitute Aspirin as my pain meds, I had to start making some independent choices.
First, I went looking for an appointment with my Primary Care Physician.
Second, I made an effort to reduce the level of acetaminophen going into my system while maintaining the same level of hydrocodone by switching back to the elixir, the liquid form of my meds, for my two overnight doses.
So, out came the M&Ms again. I had made a “big bag” purchase of M&Ms from Wal Mart, 45 ozs for just under $7, to replenish my supply.
I took my 10:00PM dose the first night as liquid and set up the M&Ms for my 2:00AM dose. Amy and I stayed up until after 12:00AM talking, so I finally got to sleep by about 12:30AM. So, I was understandably tired when my alarm went off for my next dose. I remember the confusion I had when I opened the case and saw the brown and orange M&Ms. Then it came back to me. So, I took my liquid meds, and found that disposing of the M&Ms by eating them helped get rid of the awful taste of the meds in my mouth! Yeah! Later, I added a few more M&Ms to my pill box for just a little more bad taste eradication.
Over the course of the next few nights, I found that the system worked flawlessly! So, my special thanks to my cheerleading squad for the suggestions that came together to make my meds-taking experience both memorable and efficient! I couldn’t have done it without out your help!! It gets hard to think sometimes while sick, in pain, and the groggy feelings from lack of sleep that the drugs can cause.
So, thanks again for the suggestions!!!!!
BTW, apparently the elixir caused the gas problem I had!
~~~~~~~~~~
More good news, after finally getting past the layers of bureaucracy preventing a customer from accessing the services of doctor, which would have required me to wait for 3 weeks before seeing my doctor about my pain needs, I did obtain an appointment for Monday to discuss my situation with my PCP.
My oncologist, the doctor that didn’t want me to take Vitamin C because of the ascorbic acid it contained, wants me to take aspirin, which contains acetylsalicylic acid! As a non-steroidal anti-inflammatory drug, Aspirin can cause Adverse Drug Reactions (ADRs) especially in the gastrointestingal tract, read that as the STOMACH! You know, where I have a tumor sitting across the opening to the esophagus.
Amy and I did show up for my appointment. My doctor, as my PCP and rheumatologist, shared my view that NSAIDS were not in my best interests, stomach-wise, and put me on something stronger that should still protect my stomach.
Now, this is the point where my privacy and preservation instincts kick in.
In order to obtain my new pain meds, I had to sign a Medication Management Agreement detailing my responsibilities regarding my meds, my communications with my doctor, lab studies and random drug screenings, and what happens if I fail to comply with my agreement. I currently hold a Class A CDL (Commercial Driver’s License) and am already subject to the random drug screenings, so nothing will change in that regard.
Now, from all that info, you should be able to surmise that my meds might have a “street value.” And I don’t want some “street socialist” determining where I live from info on my blog and coming to visit me because he determined that his “need” was greater than my need. There is an entire section in my agreement describing the consequences of Lost or Stolen Medications; I LOSE! I get put in the same situation as my street socialist, by law. The only way I can then obtain relief is to do the same thing that my street socialist comrade did; steal it. Isn’t it great how laws work like that? The laws actually cause crime!
Now, most of you know me. Several of you have already experienced what happens when you show up at my door without any warning and at odd hours; I am prepared to defend myself. Now, more so than previously, I don’t have the energy to punch my way out of a wet paper bag. So, as a brand new member of the female, aged, or infirmed group, I keep a weapon handy. And I do know how, and am prepared, to use it.
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
One Big Post or Many Smaller Posts?
I HAVE been trying to post lately, even though both my kids were home.
It’s just that I kept trying to put everything into one big, although edited, daily post, which meant considerable editing each time I tried to put something together. And, after several days of not posting, that approach wasted a lot of time, unfortunately. Besides, the media lends itself to multiple smaller posts quite nicely, so why not make many smaller posts?
Unfortunately, getting to that decision isn’t as easy as it seems. Part of my “conditions” is a degradation of my thought processes. It is harder, now, for me to think logically and rationally. Although I haven’t seen reference to it in my limited reading, one can learn a lot from the questions asked by the doctors and nurses. But I’ll talk more about that later, if I remember.
So, I’ll be posting thoughts, not necessarily in any particular order, just to get things out here and still take care of my personal needs.
Speaking of which, I dropped my daughter off at the airport last night. Now, you have to know, I’m the kind of parent who used to stay right there at the airport until my child was on the plane, the plane had taken off, and was no longer visible in the sky. Tyranny has changed all that. And lately, they’ve had help from some fast-growing cells.
We got to the airport early, got her all checked in and stopped to grab a bite to eat. OK, she ate; I watched. With the change in the pain meds my S-FX (Side-Effects) have been changing a little. I actually felt hunger for the first time in months yesterday. Twice! But along with that was an increase in stomach “sensation.” Now, I’m not calling it “nausea,” although I could possibly characterize it that way. With a tumor in my stomach, I can’t eat enough to really have to worry too much about food in my stomach.
But, I’m starting to ramble…
I watched Amy eat some of her “bear stew,” minus the bear, and drink her ice tea. We walked up by the “security” checkpoint, talked for a while, and then I begged off hanging around. Now you know something is wrong right there; remember the “aircraft out of sight?” We hugged goodbye, she made it through the checkpoint, this time, and we waved good-bye for a last time. Then I made my way home.
There was something wrong with my glasses, I guess; I kept having trouble seeing.
So, I was home and in bed before her plane got off the ground.
Yeah, I was pretty beat. I decided that I wouldn’t even try to stay up and do anything like post to this blog. So, as soon as I had taken my 6:00PM meds, I sent Amy a text message telling her what was up and went to bed. I slept until my midnight meds. My son came home from work shortly thereafter so I got up, talked with him for a while, set some things up for this morning, and by that time, Amy should have arrived at her airport. So, another brief TM (text message) exchange to hear that she had landed just fine, and it was back to bed.
I overslept my 6:00AM meds alarm, apparently without ill effects, got up to put some food in my stomach, and to get this missive off to my cheerleading squad on the blog. Now, it’s not even 9:00AM yet and I’m already starting to droop.
I went into this round of chemo in better shape than the last time. And, they were supposed to reduce the doses by 20%. However, I did wear the pump for the full five days instead of three like the last time.
So with my daughter coming home, my desire to spend as much time with her as possible, everyone wanting to stop by to see Amy and me, and the changes in the chemo, I tried to do it all and found that I couldn’t. So I had to let some things slide. I’m sorry, but it was the blog.
Now, I think I’m going to go take a nap and see if I can’t post something later.
It’s just that I kept trying to put everything into one big, although edited, daily post, which meant considerable editing each time I tried to put something together. And, after several days of not posting, that approach wasted a lot of time, unfortunately. Besides, the media lends itself to multiple smaller posts quite nicely, so why not make many smaller posts?
Unfortunately, getting to that decision isn’t as easy as it seems. Part of my “conditions” is a degradation of my thought processes. It is harder, now, for me to think logically and rationally. Although I haven’t seen reference to it in my limited reading, one can learn a lot from the questions asked by the doctors and nurses. But I’ll talk more about that later, if I remember.
So, I’ll be posting thoughts, not necessarily in any particular order, just to get things out here and still take care of my personal needs.
Speaking of which, I dropped my daughter off at the airport last night. Now, you have to know, I’m the kind of parent who used to stay right there at the airport until my child was on the plane, the plane had taken off, and was no longer visible in the sky. Tyranny has changed all that. And lately, they’ve had help from some fast-growing cells.
We got to the airport early, got her all checked in and stopped to grab a bite to eat. OK, she ate; I watched. With the change in the pain meds my S-FX (Side-Effects) have been changing a little. I actually felt hunger for the first time in months yesterday. Twice! But along with that was an increase in stomach “sensation.” Now, I’m not calling it “nausea,” although I could possibly characterize it that way. With a tumor in my stomach, I can’t eat enough to really have to worry too much about food in my stomach.
But, I’m starting to ramble…
I watched Amy eat some of her “bear stew,” minus the bear, and drink her ice tea. We walked up by the “security” checkpoint, talked for a while, and then I begged off hanging around. Now you know something is wrong right there; remember the “aircraft out of sight?” We hugged goodbye, she made it through the checkpoint, this time, and we waved good-bye for a last time. Then I made my way home.
There was something wrong with my glasses, I guess; I kept having trouble seeing.
So, I was home and in bed before her plane got off the ground.
Yeah, I was pretty beat. I decided that I wouldn’t even try to stay up and do anything like post to this blog. So, as soon as I had taken my 6:00PM meds, I sent Amy a text message telling her what was up and went to bed. I slept until my midnight meds. My son came home from work shortly thereafter so I got up, talked with him for a while, set some things up for this morning, and by that time, Amy should have arrived at her airport. So, another brief TM (text message) exchange to hear that she had landed just fine, and it was back to bed.
I overslept my 6:00AM meds alarm, apparently without ill effects, got up to put some food in my stomach, and to get this missive off to my cheerleading squad on the blog. Now, it’s not even 9:00AM yet and I’m already starting to droop.
I went into this round of chemo in better shape than the last time. And, they were supposed to reduce the doses by 20%. However, I did wear the pump for the full five days instead of three like the last time.
So with my daughter coming home, my desire to spend as much time with her as possible, everyone wanting to stop by to see Amy and me, and the changes in the chemo, I tried to do it all and found that I couldn’t. So I had to let some things slide. I’m sorry, but it was the blog.
Now, I think I’m going to go take a nap and see if I can’t post something later.
Thursday, October 4, 2007
She's Ba-a-a-ack!!
We just got back from the airport and put the luggage away. but my daughter is back home again!
Yesterday; Miercoles, Oct. 3!
Let’s start with the three hours of sleep, or thereabouts, that I got due to the side effects of my Dexamethasone, a steroid to reduce my edema. But I’ve operated on less sleep before. And I figured I could catch a nap or two in “The Chair” hooked up to their pump.
I was attended by Nurse “S.” Now you know that something is up when I won’t give her name. As I asked Kris yesterday, “What do they call the worst graduating student from “doctor school?” That’s simple; they still call him Doctor!
That can happen with nurses as well, but Nurse “S” wasn’t quite that bad.
Although she is quite personable, watching her I wasn’t impressed with her technique. And as the recipient of her technique I was less impressed. I’ve had several hookups to my implanted port that have all happened with virtually no sensation for the needle stick after the “freezing spray” which numbs the area. As you might imagine, the needle for the port is a rather large gauge and makes a big hole. So she stuck me in a spot different than the white spot generated by the cold spray and complained that I moved. So, as you can imagine, after expecting no pain, I moved, but only after I felt the unexpected pain.
While she was off getting another needle set, I adjusted my position on the chair so I couldn’t move even if she didn’t use the spray. When she got back she made adjustments to make that more of a certainty. It still hurt.
And, she forgot that I’d be hooked up to a portable pump later. The needle set for the portable pump has “wings” allowing for taping points to secure the needle in the port. Rather than go through all the fuss with placing another needle set, all she did was place a thin membrane bandage over the needle area. I’ve listened to the crinkle of the bandage all day and part of the night, as it has loosened on top, which will allow the access of water when I shower and has allowed the tipping of the needle in the pot.
I expect better service than that.
She withdrew the necessary blood for the lab work, leaving me alone while they waited for the lab work.
Did I mention that I’d had only about 3 hours of sleep the night before?
Nurse Dawn showed up a bit later and requested that we go across the hall to the consultation rooms. I asked why and she responded that she needed to get some info from me. I wasn’t thinking that this was a prelude to the doctor’s visit so I didn’t bring my supporting paperwork with me. Luckily I had my questions loaded into my iPAQ, my PDA, in my shirt pocket. Even though we only got part way through my first question.
The nurse and I did what we needed to do, and then I waited for the doctor. We went through what he needed and then we got to my concerns. First on my list was my pain meds. Go figure.
Now, I had been surprised, considering what I had been hearing from the other oncologists, when Nurse Dawn had said that I could only take 8 PCs per day despite what the label directions on my meds say.
Even so, I was still more surprised when this oncologist said the same thing.
I told the doctor that the elixir I had been originally prescribed was a combo of 7.5 mg hydrocodone / 500 mg acetaminophen, but the pills, issued under his direction, had lowered the hydrocodone to 5.0 mg with no reduction in acetaminophen.
I tried to explain to him that acetaminophen has little effect on me. I’ve had two prescriptions for Tylenol #3 w/ codeine in my dresser drawer until recently, one from the mid 80s and another from the mid 90s, which I simply hadn’t taken because they never seemed to work for me. I’d never known what all the fuss was about with that drug. I kept them around in case I had some really bad pain so I could actually try them out.
I also brought up the issue of my right upper quadrant pain as possibly being the result of all the acetaminophen.
And I brought up the issue of the recent onset of pain from old Workmen’s Comp injuries that my PC doesn’t seem to alleviate at all; my right lower back which was injured two years ago which now involves the tendons at the top of the hip as well; my left hip joint injured in my dispute in 2004 with that Ottawa spotting truck; and a relatively new pain, this year, anyway, in the right ankle unrelated to any injury.
All the right side pain has actually caused me to occasionally rely on the cane given to me by Kris. It didn’t “fit” her; but it seems to work well for me. Thanks, again, Kris!
That’s when he, the doctor, BLEW MY MIND! He told me to discontinue my PC, the hydrocodone/acetaminophen, and to start taking aspirin. ASPIRIN!!!
Oh, he modified his statement to include ibuprofen, naproxen sodium, and the like. Whatever NSAIDS I wanted to take.
Now, because of the short time we have had together and the medical history he didn’t get, he wasn’t aware that my stomach pain that I characterized as “gastritis” before we found out that was cancer, I believed to be started, or at least exacerbated, by the naproxen sodium prescribed by a POS (Prevea Orthopedic Surgeon, and yes, I picked those initials on purpose; I didn’t stutter.) for a Workman’s Comp injury to my right shoulder. I injured my shoulder; he took x-rays, found a bone spur, and wanted to operate, RIGHT AWAY, to remove it. Oh, he’d also check the rotator cuff while he was in the shoulder.
Now, the shoulder hadn’t hurt before the injury, and after shifting the pain around for awhile due to the change in my work efforts and the physical therapy, the pain eventually went away. My point is I disagreed with a doctor’s desire to use his “hammer” to take care of a problem that probably didn’t need the use of a hammer.
And, I didn’t do my homework on the meds he prescribed, so I developed an NSAID stomach reaction.
So, since it has been on my mind, I asked about the use of spices and the extracts of spices, specifically the spice turmeric, the extract curcumin, and a brand called Curamin that contains curcumins and other ingredients, which have excellent pain and anti-inflammation properties without the side effects of NSAIDS. One double blind study had curcumin matching the effects of cortisone, a steroid!
Silly me; I asked this of a doctor whom I had to fight to allow me to take Vitamin C. He blew me off.
Now, following the doctor’s regime STRICTLY, I have only a one in four chance of seeing the next five years. He’s only interested in me following his rules for a one in four chance of living to see 60; I’m interested in doing whatever it takes to stay alive longer. I’d like to better those odds. Now, I’ll work with him as much as possible, but some things have got to change.
Now, tell me this. Why, if aspirin would have worked in the first place, did they prescribe PC for me? If it wouldn’t work then, and we need to change the acetaminophen levels now, why do we want to use aspirin?
I tried to set up an appointment with my PCP (primary care physician) but the earliest they could schedule me in was in three weeks. I asked them to see if they could get me in sooner. I haven’t heard back yet. As soon as this gets posted I’ll try calling again.
Now, you’ll have to forgive me for my attitude. My work experience and education has been in Quality Management, which usually includes customer service. I’m extremely critical of customer service issues. But with the medical profession, there is a paradigm shift; we aren’t “customers,” we’re “patients.” A science fiction author, Philip K. Dick, said, “"The basic tool for the manipulation of reality is the manipulation of words. If you can control the meaning of words, you can control the people who must use the words."
This is how they manipulate us, by manipulating the usage of the language. Oh, we, or our agents, still pay for their services, but they get to decide the level of acceptable behavior. And our “agents,” our companies and their insurance companies, make it hard for us to shop around for better service.
Look at the word "patient;" what’s it mean? Someone is a doctor’s care, right? But it also means able to “wait or endure calmly or to be persevering.” Something a person in pain shouldn’t have to do. Notice how they do that?
Now, what does the word customer mean when it comes to expecting service from a doctor? Notice the difference?
Right now, I’m associated with a place that took two months to get an appointment with my PCP, when my company changed insurance carriers, even though I was sick at the time with my “gastritis” because I was a new patient (it’s their rules); where I saw another of their doctors, on an emergency basis, for my “gastritis” (cancer) and was only prescribed Prilosec OTC; where I later had an EGD with six biopsies taken and they lost the biopsies and had to repeat (for free, at least) the EGD; and the list continues to go on today.
As sister Cuz would say, “Grrrrrrr.”
Last night I slept well until 2:00AM again. Took my scheduled meds and tried to get back to sleep.
One of the side effects of one of my chemotherapy drugs is the hiccups which manifested themselves last night after my 2AM meds. When I hiccup I sometimes ingest air into the stomach causing gas pressure on the top of the stomach.
Now, this is an old complaint for me, but one that caused a lot of problems until I figured out what was happening. It first started early in my marriage. I would get anxiety attacks and since they were manifesting themselves during the time period we were undergoing counseling, they caused some problems in the marriage.
I saw doctors for the anxiety attacks, had a battery of tests, and the doctors couldn’t figure it out. Therefore, it was perceived as a “mental condition.” Later, I found out different.
Due to the ingestion of carbonated sodas, and other sources of digestive gas, I would generate gas pressure in the stomach. Usually, I could get rid of it, but not always. When I couldn’t, or before I could get rid of it, the gas would press on a certain “magic” spot on the upper stomach, which would press on a nerve—the Vagus nerve, I believe—which would then cause heart palpitations. These would in turn would cause the release of adrenaline, causing an anxiety attack. Sounds complicated, but can happen very quickly.
Once I realized what was happening, I could actually short circuit the process, stopping or at least curtailing the adrenaline release. Then I would make a special effort to “express” the gas.
Well, it seems that the situation is happening again. I’m not getting to the adrenaline stage due to my previous experience in the 70s, but it is still alarming when it happens, especially when you’re not aware of the gas.
It happened as Nurse “S” was disconnecting me from the Clinic pump and hooking up my personal pump. Now, I wasn’t aware of the gas build up, but I noticed the heart fluctuations. Since I was watching with dismay the air in the plastic tubing going into my body—“Oh it would take a garden hose of air to cause problems…”—it still was disturbing when I have air going into my veins and my heart start to act up. Once I felt the gas pressure, I knew what the problem was and put a clamp on the anxiety and waited for the opportunity to get rid of the gas.
So, it wasn’t much of a surprise when it started happening overnight. That’s happened before with this “gastritis” episode. What is means is that I can’t sleep in a position where the gas presses upon that “magic” spot; the palpitations will wake me up. Usually I sit up, try to express the gas, and after expressing it, lay back down and go to sleep. The placement of the tumor makes the expression difficult at night sometimes, like last night.
The other thing that helps is when I change positions, when I sleep on my other side. Except I now have a “tether” that makes waking up enough to do some critical thinking necessary for changing positions; rerouting the hose, etc. Then it's hard to get back to sleep.
So, again, I didn’t get much sleep after 2:00AM. Again, I’m going to be tired all day, wanting to sleep, and knowing I should save it all up for nighttime.
Some other notes, as long as I’m here.
My daughter gets in tonight at 8:49PM. I’m looking forward to picking her up at the airport. As I mentioned in an earlier comment, I have some concerns wearing my personal chemotherapy pump into an airport.
I recently mentioned to Robin a quote by Gerald Massey that goes like this, “They must find it difficult.... Those who have taken authority as the truth, rather than truth as authority.” But, as Pontius Pilate asked, “What is truth?” It’s usually easier to determine authority than it is to determine truth.
To that end, I obtained a “prescription” from an "authority" for my pump. Now, if I can only get it out of my pocket without being shot for carrying a “mock explosive device.”
Cuz, I did find the slippery elm lozenges, but haven’t had the opportunity to try them yet. I did find another product that works well for dry mouth called Rain, at the health food store, ~$12. I tried Salivart for the same issue from Shopko at the same price but it doesn’t work well at all. The “Rain” contains xylitol, which is a type of sugar with five carbon atoms instead of the six found in sucrose. It seems to help.
And I’m doing the saline mouthwash for the mouth issues.
I’m taking a diuretic for the edema, but it depletes the potassium in my body. So they prescribed a potassium supplement. Talk about a “horse pill!” Luckily it can be crushed; it made my yogurt crunchy, this morning.
I apologize for the length of this “Brain Dump” as Robin calls them. As Marcus T. Cicero once said, "If I had more time, I would have written a shorter letter." And I have been going back and editing this somewhat.
And did I mention my lack of sleep?
Thanks for putting up with all this. And I’ll try to catch up on my email later today.
I was attended by Nurse “S.” Now you know that something is up when I won’t give her name. As I asked Kris yesterday, “What do they call the worst graduating student from “doctor school?” That’s simple; they still call him Doctor!
That can happen with nurses as well, but Nurse “S” wasn’t quite that bad.
Although she is quite personable, watching her I wasn’t impressed with her technique. And as the recipient of her technique I was less impressed. I’ve had several hookups to my implanted port that have all happened with virtually no sensation for the needle stick after the “freezing spray” which numbs the area. As you might imagine, the needle for the port is a rather large gauge and makes a big hole. So she stuck me in a spot different than the white spot generated by the cold spray and complained that I moved. So, as you can imagine, after expecting no pain, I moved, but only after I felt the unexpected pain.
While she was off getting another needle set, I adjusted my position on the chair so I couldn’t move even if she didn’t use the spray. When she got back she made adjustments to make that more of a certainty. It still hurt.
And, she forgot that I’d be hooked up to a portable pump later. The needle set for the portable pump has “wings” allowing for taping points to secure the needle in the port. Rather than go through all the fuss with placing another needle set, all she did was place a thin membrane bandage over the needle area. I’ve listened to the crinkle of the bandage all day and part of the night, as it has loosened on top, which will allow the access of water when I shower and has allowed the tipping of the needle in the pot.
I expect better service than that.
She withdrew the necessary blood for the lab work, leaving me alone while they waited for the lab work.
Did I mention that I’d had only about 3 hours of sleep the night before?
Nurse Dawn showed up a bit later and requested that we go across the hall to the consultation rooms. I asked why and she responded that she needed to get some info from me. I wasn’t thinking that this was a prelude to the doctor’s visit so I didn’t bring my supporting paperwork with me. Luckily I had my questions loaded into my iPAQ, my PDA, in my shirt pocket. Even though we only got part way through my first question.
The nurse and I did what we needed to do, and then I waited for the doctor. We went through what he needed and then we got to my concerns. First on my list was my pain meds. Go figure.
Now, I had been surprised, considering what I had been hearing from the other oncologists, when Nurse Dawn had said that I could only take 8 PCs per day despite what the label directions on my meds say.
Even so, I was still more surprised when this oncologist said the same thing.
I told the doctor that the elixir I had been originally prescribed was a combo of 7.5 mg hydrocodone / 500 mg acetaminophen, but the pills, issued under his direction, had lowered the hydrocodone to 5.0 mg with no reduction in acetaminophen.
I tried to explain to him that acetaminophen has little effect on me. I’ve had two prescriptions for Tylenol #3 w/ codeine in my dresser drawer until recently, one from the mid 80s and another from the mid 90s, which I simply hadn’t taken because they never seemed to work for me. I’d never known what all the fuss was about with that drug. I kept them around in case I had some really bad pain so I could actually try them out.
I also brought up the issue of my right upper quadrant pain as possibly being the result of all the acetaminophen.
And I brought up the issue of the recent onset of pain from old Workmen’s Comp injuries that my PC doesn’t seem to alleviate at all; my right lower back which was injured two years ago which now involves the tendons at the top of the hip as well; my left hip joint injured in my dispute in 2004 with that Ottawa spotting truck; and a relatively new pain, this year, anyway, in the right ankle unrelated to any injury.
All the right side pain has actually caused me to occasionally rely on the cane given to me by Kris. It didn’t “fit” her; but it seems to work well for me. Thanks, again, Kris!
That’s when he, the doctor, BLEW MY MIND! He told me to discontinue my PC, the hydrocodone/acetaminophen, and to start taking aspirin. ASPIRIN!!!
Oh, he modified his statement to include ibuprofen, naproxen sodium, and the like. Whatever NSAIDS I wanted to take.
Now, because of the short time we have had together and the medical history he didn’t get, he wasn’t aware that my stomach pain that I characterized as “gastritis” before we found out that was cancer, I believed to be started, or at least exacerbated, by the naproxen sodium prescribed by a POS (Prevea Orthopedic Surgeon, and yes, I picked those initials on purpose; I didn’t stutter.) for a Workman’s Comp injury to my right shoulder. I injured my shoulder; he took x-rays, found a bone spur, and wanted to operate, RIGHT AWAY, to remove it. Oh, he’d also check the rotator cuff while he was in the shoulder.
Now, the shoulder hadn’t hurt before the injury, and after shifting the pain around for awhile due to the change in my work efforts and the physical therapy, the pain eventually went away. My point is I disagreed with a doctor’s desire to use his “hammer” to take care of a problem that probably didn’t need the use of a hammer.
And, I didn’t do my homework on the meds he prescribed, so I developed an NSAID stomach reaction.
So, since it has been on my mind, I asked about the use of spices and the extracts of spices, specifically the spice turmeric, the extract curcumin, and a brand called Curamin that contains curcumins and other ingredients, which have excellent pain and anti-inflammation properties without the side effects of NSAIDS. One double blind study had curcumin matching the effects of cortisone, a steroid!
Silly me; I asked this of a doctor whom I had to fight to allow me to take Vitamin C. He blew me off.
Now, following the doctor’s regime STRICTLY, I have only a one in four chance of seeing the next five years. He’s only interested in me following his rules for a one in four chance of living to see 60; I’m interested in doing whatever it takes to stay alive longer. I’d like to better those odds. Now, I’ll work with him as much as possible, but some things have got to change.
Now, tell me this. Why, if aspirin would have worked in the first place, did they prescribe PC for me? If it wouldn’t work then, and we need to change the acetaminophen levels now, why do we want to use aspirin?
I tried to set up an appointment with my PCP (primary care physician) but the earliest they could schedule me in was in three weeks. I asked them to see if they could get me in sooner. I haven’t heard back yet. As soon as this gets posted I’ll try calling again.
Now, you’ll have to forgive me for my attitude. My work experience and education has been in Quality Management, which usually includes customer service. I’m extremely critical of customer service issues. But with the medical profession, there is a paradigm shift; we aren’t “customers,” we’re “patients.” A science fiction author, Philip K. Dick, said, “"The basic tool for the manipulation of reality is the manipulation of words. If you can control the meaning of words, you can control the people who must use the words."
This is how they manipulate us, by manipulating the usage of the language. Oh, we, or our agents, still pay for their services, but they get to decide the level of acceptable behavior. And our “agents,” our companies and their insurance companies, make it hard for us to shop around for better service.
Look at the word "patient;" what’s it mean? Someone is a doctor’s care, right? But it also means able to “wait or endure calmly or to be persevering.” Something a person in pain shouldn’t have to do. Notice how they do that?
Now, what does the word customer mean when it comes to expecting service from a doctor? Notice the difference?
Right now, I’m associated with a place that took two months to get an appointment with my PCP, when my company changed insurance carriers, even though I was sick at the time with my “gastritis” because I was a new patient (it’s their rules); where I saw another of their doctors, on an emergency basis, for my “gastritis” (cancer) and was only prescribed Prilosec OTC; where I later had an EGD with six biopsies taken and they lost the biopsies and had to repeat (for free, at least) the EGD; and the list continues to go on today.
As sister Cuz would say, “Grrrrrrr.”
Last night I slept well until 2:00AM again. Took my scheduled meds and tried to get back to sleep.
One of the side effects of one of my chemotherapy drugs is the hiccups which manifested themselves last night after my 2AM meds. When I hiccup I sometimes ingest air into the stomach causing gas pressure on the top of the stomach.
Now, this is an old complaint for me, but one that caused a lot of problems until I figured out what was happening. It first started early in my marriage. I would get anxiety attacks and since they were manifesting themselves during the time period we were undergoing counseling, they caused some problems in the marriage.
I saw doctors for the anxiety attacks, had a battery of tests, and the doctors couldn’t figure it out. Therefore, it was perceived as a “mental condition.” Later, I found out different.
Due to the ingestion of carbonated sodas, and other sources of digestive gas, I would generate gas pressure in the stomach. Usually, I could get rid of it, but not always. When I couldn’t, or before I could get rid of it, the gas would press on a certain “magic” spot on the upper stomach, which would press on a nerve—the Vagus nerve, I believe—which would then cause heart palpitations. These would in turn would cause the release of adrenaline, causing an anxiety attack. Sounds complicated, but can happen very quickly.
Once I realized what was happening, I could actually short circuit the process, stopping or at least curtailing the adrenaline release. Then I would make a special effort to “express” the gas.
Well, it seems that the situation is happening again. I’m not getting to the adrenaline stage due to my previous experience in the 70s, but it is still alarming when it happens, especially when you’re not aware of the gas.
It happened as Nurse “S” was disconnecting me from the Clinic pump and hooking up my personal pump. Now, I wasn’t aware of the gas build up, but I noticed the heart fluctuations. Since I was watching with dismay the air in the plastic tubing going into my body—“Oh it would take a garden hose of air to cause problems…”—it still was disturbing when I have air going into my veins and my heart start to act up. Once I felt the gas pressure, I knew what the problem was and put a clamp on the anxiety and waited for the opportunity to get rid of the gas.
So, it wasn’t much of a surprise when it started happening overnight. That’s happened before with this “gastritis” episode. What is means is that I can’t sleep in a position where the gas presses upon that “magic” spot; the palpitations will wake me up. Usually I sit up, try to express the gas, and after expressing it, lay back down and go to sleep. The placement of the tumor makes the expression difficult at night sometimes, like last night.
The other thing that helps is when I change positions, when I sleep on my other side. Except I now have a “tether” that makes waking up enough to do some critical thinking necessary for changing positions; rerouting the hose, etc. Then it's hard to get back to sleep.
So, again, I didn’t get much sleep after 2:00AM. Again, I’m going to be tired all day, wanting to sleep, and knowing I should save it all up for nighttime.
Some other notes, as long as I’m here.
My daughter gets in tonight at 8:49PM. I’m looking forward to picking her up at the airport. As I mentioned in an earlier comment, I have some concerns wearing my personal chemotherapy pump into an airport.
I recently mentioned to Robin a quote by Gerald Massey that goes like this, “They must find it difficult.... Those who have taken authority as the truth, rather than truth as authority.” But, as Pontius Pilate asked, “What is truth?” It’s usually easier to determine authority than it is to determine truth.
To that end, I obtained a “prescription” from an "authority" for my pump. Now, if I can only get it out of my pocket without being shot for carrying a “mock explosive device.”
Cuz, I did find the slippery elm lozenges, but haven’t had the opportunity to try them yet. I did find another product that works well for dry mouth called Rain, at the health food store, ~$12. I tried Salivart for the same issue from Shopko at the same price but it doesn’t work well at all. The “Rain” contains xylitol, which is a type of sugar with five carbon atoms instead of the six found in sucrose. It seems to help.
And I’m doing the saline mouthwash for the mouth issues.
I’m taking a diuretic for the edema, but it depletes the potassium in my body. So they prescribed a potassium supplement. Talk about a “horse pill!” Luckily it can be crushed; it made my yogurt crunchy, this morning.
I apologize for the length of this “Brain Dump” as Robin calls them. As Marcus T. Cicero once said, "If I had more time, I would have written a shorter letter." And I have been going back and editing this somewhat.
And did I mention my lack of sleep?
Thanks for putting up with all this. And I’ll try to catch up on my email later today.
Wednesday, October 3, 2007
I Knew It!
And, it’s not your fault, Robin. I just don’t like to have to go get this fight started; I’m a lover not a fighter!
I finally got to sleep about 11:30PM last night. Then, I proceeded to sleep through my 2:00AM alarm. Luckily I had two alarms set. The second one finally woke me up; probably woke Ben up, as well, if he hadn’t gone to bed yet.
Took my meds and tried to fall back asleep. Not gonna happen. So, with pain in the upper right quadrant, I got up to investigate the sounds coming from the kitchen, and to get a bottle of Ensure, hoping that something in the stomach might quell the pain. That’s after the two, count ‘em, two PC at 2:00AM. They should have kicked in by 3:00AM, wouldn’t you think? Maybe they had.
Anyway, I found out that Himmy had tipped over the kitchen garbage can. Must have been the smell of the meat package I threw out last night.
I had purchased some thin steaks, diced them, and stir-fried them with some mushrooms and dark soy sauce for supper. That used to be a favorite meal of mine when I could use some Sriracha sauce, a hot chili sauce, as well. Now it’s relatively bland; I’ll have to see what I can do about that without destroying my stomach.
Eating supper, I thought for a bit that I was going to suffer from an esophageal sphincter spasm again. It had all the earmarks started, but when it hurts that much, you learn quickly. But I let my stomach settle for a few minutes and started eating again, vewy, vewy, carefuwy! Did just fine after that.
Back to 3AM, I went back to bed, and never got back to sleep. OK, maybe about 5:30 I might have dozed off. But the alarm woke me at 6:00AM and I got up to get my day started.
I’m finding that the Dexamethasone might be the drug, a steroid, that has, and probably had, been causing my dry mouth that I had so much trouble with before. I can tell a change in the taste of food as well. My iced tea just doesn’t taste the same.
Anyway, came out to the kitchen and found that Himmy had knocked the recyclable bin and the garbage can over again. Nothing was pulled out. He either wanted to smell what was in there or was just trying to climb up on them. No big deal. It’s just that they're getting to feel at home here and that’s always good, right?
Thanks for the info last night, Kris. I read it before trying to sleep. I think what I’ll do, just to keep the kids up on what’s going on is to put a meds section in my “Sticky” Schedule post when I get home tonight.
Let’s look forward to happy times; tomorrow I get to see my daughter again!!
I finally got to sleep about 11:30PM last night. Then, I proceeded to sleep through my 2:00AM alarm. Luckily I had two alarms set. The second one finally woke me up; probably woke Ben up, as well, if he hadn’t gone to bed yet.
Took my meds and tried to fall back asleep. Not gonna happen. So, with pain in the upper right quadrant, I got up to investigate the sounds coming from the kitchen, and to get a bottle of Ensure, hoping that something in the stomach might quell the pain. That’s after the two, count ‘em, two PC at 2:00AM. They should have kicked in by 3:00AM, wouldn’t you think? Maybe they had.
Anyway, I found out that Himmy had tipped over the kitchen garbage can. Must have been the smell of the meat package I threw out last night.
I had purchased some thin steaks, diced them, and stir-fried them with some mushrooms and dark soy sauce for supper. That used to be a favorite meal of mine when I could use some Sriracha sauce, a hot chili sauce, as well. Now it’s relatively bland; I’ll have to see what I can do about that without destroying my stomach.
Eating supper, I thought for a bit that I was going to suffer from an esophageal sphincter spasm again. It had all the earmarks started, but when it hurts that much, you learn quickly. But I let my stomach settle for a few minutes and started eating again, vewy, vewy, carefuwy! Did just fine after that.
Back to 3AM, I went back to bed, and never got back to sleep. OK, maybe about 5:30 I might have dozed off. But the alarm woke me at 6:00AM and I got up to get my day started.
I’m finding that the Dexamethasone might be the drug, a steroid, that has, and probably had, been causing my dry mouth that I had so much trouble with before. I can tell a change in the taste of food as well. My iced tea just doesn’t taste the same.
Anyway, came out to the kitchen and found that Himmy had knocked the recyclable bin and the garbage can over again. Nothing was pulled out. He either wanted to smell what was in there or was just trying to climb up on them. No big deal. It’s just that they're getting to feel at home here and that’s always good, right?
Thanks for the info last night, Kris. I read it before trying to sleep. I think what I’ll do, just to keep the kids up on what’s going on is to put a meds section in my “Sticky” Schedule post when I get home tonight.
Let’s look forward to happy times; tomorrow I get to see my daughter again!!
Tuesday, October 2, 2007
Bait and Switch Revisited
Just in case you only read the new posts, I’d like to say that late breaking news from yesterday (OK it was early afternoon) was that my October 10 EGD was cancelled. As procedures go, it’s relatively harmless. But it’s the thought that they’re sticking a tube and camera down my throat that bugs me.
AND, I started the use of color in the “’Sticky’ Schedule” to highlight certain dates.
~~~~~~~~~~
My "horrorscope" today made the comment, “Perfection isn't the goal -- happiness is.” I seem to recall someone saying something like this about housework…. :-D
~~~~~~~~~~
Mousebane is loving it here. When the cats first came with Ben to live here, the only time I got to see them was when Ben got up to get ready for work and about 9:30 – 10:00 PM when Ben was expected home. Then they came up and were fairly vocal; it was feeding time, don’tcha know?
Now, Mousebane is waiting for me in the kitchen when I get up. He gets some loving and a good brushing, just a purrin' all the while. I’m using one of my old hairbrushes since I’m not using them!
But he does enjoy it.
~~~~~~~~~~
I had an opportunity to talk to Robin last night, so I seized it. It was nice to talk to her again. I’m sorry to say I can’t remember the last time I did talk to her. That memory is sitting just outside of my grasp right now; I may remember later.
I’ve always enjoyed her “accent” for want of a better term; an Ohio girl living in Utah via California. They say that music hath charms to soothe the savage breast. Well her voice has the same effect for me.
I was able to offer some hopefully helpful advice; only time will tell. But the situation did bring home to me the need I have to explain to all of you what has gone on with me that might help explain me to you. Maybe when you understand what I have to say, a lot of questions you have about me will be answered.
~~~~~~~~~~
Acetaminophen, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Acetaminophen, has very little anti-inflammatory effects, which is probably why it doesn’t usually work well for me at all. I usually have inflammation associated with pain. As a matter of fact, since I started eating again, my joint pain has flared up and either my PC won’t touch it, or the pain is so great that I’d hate to be without my PC right now. I’m betting that the PC just doesn’t touch this type of pain.
Getting back to acetaminophen, in the UK sales are limited to 32 and 16 tablets in pharmacies and non-pharmacy locations respectively because of the chance of liver toxicity. In Ireland it is limited to 24 and 12 tablets respectively.
So, let’s talk toxic doses. “The toxic dose of paracetamol [acetaminophen –HB] is highly variable. In adults, single doses above 10 grams [10000 mg –HB] or 150 mg/kg have a reasonable likelihood of causing toxicity. Toxicity can also occur when multiple smaller doses within 24 hours exceeds these levels, or even with chronic ingestion of doses as low as 4 g [4000 mg –HB]/day, and death with as little as 6 g [6000 mg –HB]/day.”
My current prescription allows me to consume 3 – 8 grams (3000 – 8000 mg) of acetaminophen per day. I am currently taking 3.5 g (3500 mg) per day. That means I experience "chronic ingestion" of 500 mg less than the 4000 mg they mention above.
Diagnosis? “Evidence of liver toxicity may develop in one to four days, although in severe cases it may be evident in 12 hours. Right upper quadrant tenderness may be present.” I may not have right upper quadrant tenderness but I do have right upper quadrant pain. Prior to this I thought it was just the tumor; normal pain for my condition has usually been on the left side and just below the rib cage. Now I’m not so sure.
And, oh yeah, something I didn't know, acetaminophen/ paracetamol is addictive!!!!! “Surprisingly, paracetamol can be physically addictive: the needed dose increases with each administration, and there is a distinct withdrawal syndrome, which resembles the headache for which the drug was first taken, but not exactly.”
So, based on this one article, not only will I need more and more acetaminophen to maintain my "buzz," but I’ll be in pain when I try to quit.
Or am I wrong to be concerned with the doctors prescribing meds that keep me so close to a toxic dose? That I’m dependent on their being alert for any changes in my condition just to keep me alive and well, when the only contact I have with them is that which I initiate. You’ve seen my schedule; doctor appointments are several weeks apart, while liver toxicity can develop in 1 – 4 days! When I can get pain from eating at the wrong time—last night I started to eat ½ hour before taking my pain meds instead of 1 hour after taking my pain meds and it caused me some pain—or because the food was a little too spicy, I’m more likely to ignore it because I think I know, correctly or incorrectly, what the reason for the pain is.
This is why I dislike doctors. Just because they prescribe toxic drugs in the hopes that the chemotherapy kills the cancer before it kills me doesn’t mean that they should do the same with my pain meds.
Or am I out of line on this?
AND, I started the use of color in the “’Sticky’ Schedule” to highlight certain dates.
~~~~~~~~~~
My "horrorscope" today made the comment, “Perfection isn't the goal -- happiness is.” I seem to recall someone saying something like this about housework…. :-D
~~~~~~~~~~
Mousebane is loving it here. When the cats first came with Ben to live here, the only time I got to see them was when Ben got up to get ready for work and about 9:30 – 10:00 PM when Ben was expected home. Then they came up and were fairly vocal; it was feeding time, don’tcha know?
Now, Mousebane is waiting for me in the kitchen when I get up. He gets some loving and a good brushing, just a purrin' all the while. I’m using one of my old hairbrushes since I’m not using them!
But he does enjoy it.
~~~~~~~~~~
I had an opportunity to talk to Robin last night, so I seized it. It was nice to talk to her again. I’m sorry to say I can’t remember the last time I did talk to her. That memory is sitting just outside of my grasp right now; I may remember later.
I’ve always enjoyed her “accent” for want of a better term; an Ohio girl living in Utah via California. They say that music hath charms to soothe the savage breast. Well her voice has the same effect for me.
I was able to offer some hopefully helpful advice; only time will tell. But the situation did bring home to me the need I have to explain to all of you what has gone on with me that might help explain me to you. Maybe when you understand what I have to say, a lot of questions you have about me will be answered.
~~~~~~~~~~
Acetaminophen, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Acetaminophen, has very little anti-inflammatory effects, which is probably why it doesn’t usually work well for me at all. I usually have inflammation associated with pain. As a matter of fact, since I started eating again, my joint pain has flared up and either my PC won’t touch it, or the pain is so great that I’d hate to be without my PC right now. I’m betting that the PC just doesn’t touch this type of pain.
Getting back to acetaminophen, in the UK sales are limited to 32 and 16 tablets in pharmacies and non-pharmacy locations respectively because of the chance of liver toxicity. In Ireland it is limited to 24 and 12 tablets respectively.
So, let’s talk toxic doses. “The toxic dose of paracetamol [acetaminophen –HB] is highly variable. In adults, single doses above 10 grams [10000 mg –HB] or 150 mg/kg have a reasonable likelihood of causing toxicity. Toxicity can also occur when multiple smaller doses within 24 hours exceeds these levels, or even with chronic ingestion of doses as low as 4 g [4000 mg –HB]/day, and death with as little as 6 g [6000 mg –HB]/day.”
My current prescription allows me to consume 3 – 8 grams (3000 – 8000 mg) of acetaminophen per day. I am currently taking 3.5 g (3500 mg) per day. That means I experience "chronic ingestion" of 500 mg less than the 4000 mg they mention above.
Diagnosis? “Evidence of liver toxicity may develop in one to four days, although in severe cases it may be evident in 12 hours. Right upper quadrant tenderness may be present.” I may not have right upper quadrant tenderness but I do have right upper quadrant pain. Prior to this I thought it was just the tumor; normal pain for my condition has usually been on the left side and just below the rib cage. Now I’m not so sure.
And, oh yeah, something I didn't know, acetaminophen/ paracetamol is addictive!!!!! “Surprisingly, paracetamol can be physically addictive: the needed dose increases with each administration, and there is a distinct withdrawal syndrome, which resembles the headache for which the drug was first taken, but not exactly.”
So, based on this one article, not only will I need more and more acetaminophen to maintain my "buzz," but I’ll be in pain when I try to quit.
Or am I wrong to be concerned with the doctors prescribing meds that keep me so close to a toxic dose? That I’m dependent on their being alert for any changes in my condition just to keep me alive and well, when the only contact I have with them is that which I initiate. You’ve seen my schedule; doctor appointments are several weeks apart, while liver toxicity can develop in 1 – 4 days! When I can get pain from eating at the wrong time—last night I started to eat ½ hour before taking my pain meds instead of 1 hour after taking my pain meds and it caused me some pain—or because the food was a little too spicy, I’m more likely to ignore it because I think I know, correctly or incorrectly, what the reason for the pain is.
This is why I dislike doctors. Just because they prescribe toxic drugs in the hopes that the chemotherapy kills the cancer before it kills me doesn’t mean that they should do the same with my pain meds.
Or am I out of line on this?
Monday, October 1, 2007
Bait and Switch
OK, I'm adding this to this post, so I don't forget tomorrow, but the EGD procedure next week has been cancelled until further notice. If I remember, I'll add it tomomorrow as well. To repeat, no more EGDs scheduled!
~~~~~~~~~
In addition to mowing the lawn, I finally took matters in hand and, for the first time in two – three years, washed the outside windows yesterday. So guess what happened last night and today. If you guessed rain, you’d be right. Maybe this should have gone in the “Some Days You’re the Bug” post.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
I stopped by the pharmacy over the weekend to get my next fix of PC. While there, the pharmacist, in addition to asking if I had any questions about my PC asked a bunch of unobtrusive questions about my “condition.” Since I had nothing to hide, and since I have a tendency to trust people with “expertise” (unless I know better), I told him what was going on with me.
But the questions he asked, and the comments he made, started me to wonder what his concerns were. So I did some checking. I found something interesting when I started to read my PC medicine labels.
The liquid form of my medication, the elixir, contained 7.5 mg. Hydrocodone / 500 mg acetaminophen per 15 mls. Label directions for usage were 15 mls every 6 hours as needed, for a maximum usage of 30 mg. Hydrocodone / 2000 mg acetaminophen every day.
Oral directions from my doctor increased the dose to 15 – 30 mls every 4 hours increasing my daily consumption to 45 - 90 mg Hydrocodone / 3000 – 6000 mg acetaminophen.
Now, the FDA has a 24-hour maximum limit for acetaminophen set at 4000 mg. So, the doctor’s orders for the liquid medicine puts me near or over the FDA’s maximum, putting me at risk for hepatotoxicity; severe liver damage!
When I could no longer tolerate the liquid form, I was switched to pill form of the drug. However, while my dosage schedule was increased—I am directed by the label to take 1 – 2 tablets every 3 – 4 hours as needed for pain—the Hydrocodone level was actually reduced to two thirds of the previous level! . Each dose, each tablet, now contains 5 mg Hydrocodone while still containing 500 mg acetaminophen.
That means on this new dosing schedule, my Hydrocodone consumption is reduced to 30 – 80 mg each day while my acetaminophen consumption is increased to 3000 – 8000 mg per day!!!!!! Twice the FDA’s maximum.
Sure, “the doctors are watching my consumption.” Yeah, right!
The Wikipedia article states, “Daily consumption of hydrocodone should not exceed 40 milligrams in patients not tolerant to opiates.” But they also point out that the PDR (Physician’s Desk Reference) makes allowances for higher dosages as long as the side effects do not manifest themselves.
Now, as a pain reliever, acetaminophen doesn’t work well for me at all. Over the years I have had opportunity to obtain prescriptions to Tylenol #3 with codeine. Until recently, I had two prescriptions for the stuff sitting in my dresser drawer; one prescription from 1985. I don’t know what the fuss was all about; it never did that much for me.
Current consumption of my PC puts me right at 35 mg / 3500 mg. One more tablet a day will max me out. Care to guess what one of my questions to my doctor on Wednesday will be?
Edit: Added schedule change!
~~~~~~~~~
In addition to mowing the lawn, I finally took matters in hand and, for the first time in two – three years, washed the outside windows yesterday. So guess what happened last night and today. If you guessed rain, you’d be right. Maybe this should have gone in the “Some Days You’re the Bug” post.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
I stopped by the pharmacy over the weekend to get my next fix of PC. While there, the pharmacist, in addition to asking if I had any questions about my PC asked a bunch of unobtrusive questions about my “condition.” Since I had nothing to hide, and since I have a tendency to trust people with “expertise” (unless I know better), I told him what was going on with me.
But the questions he asked, and the comments he made, started me to wonder what his concerns were. So I did some checking. I found something interesting when I started to read my PC medicine labels.
The liquid form of my medication, the elixir, contained 7.5 mg. Hydrocodone / 500 mg acetaminophen per 15 mls. Label directions for usage were 15 mls every 6 hours as needed, for a maximum usage of 30 mg. Hydrocodone / 2000 mg acetaminophen every day.
Oral directions from my doctor increased the dose to 15 – 30 mls every 4 hours increasing my daily consumption to 45 - 90 mg Hydrocodone / 3000 – 6000 mg acetaminophen.
Now, the FDA has a 24-hour maximum limit for acetaminophen set at 4000 mg. So, the doctor’s orders for the liquid medicine puts me near or over the FDA’s maximum, putting me at risk for hepatotoxicity; severe liver damage!
When I could no longer tolerate the liquid form, I was switched to pill form of the drug. However, while my dosage schedule was increased—I am directed by the label to take 1 – 2 tablets every 3 – 4 hours as needed for pain—the Hydrocodone level was actually reduced to two thirds of the previous level! . Each dose, each tablet, now contains 5 mg Hydrocodone while still containing 500 mg acetaminophen.
That means on this new dosing schedule, my Hydrocodone consumption is reduced to 30 – 80 mg each day while my acetaminophen consumption is increased to 3000 – 8000 mg per day!!!!!! Twice the FDA’s maximum.
Sure, “the doctors are watching my consumption.” Yeah, right!
The Wikipedia article states, “Daily consumption of hydrocodone should not exceed 40 milligrams in patients not tolerant to opiates.” But they also point out that the PDR (Physician’s Desk Reference) makes allowances for higher dosages as long as the side effects do not manifest themselves.
Now, as a pain reliever, acetaminophen doesn’t work well for me at all. Over the years I have had opportunity to obtain prescriptions to Tylenol #3 with codeine. Until recently, I had two prescriptions for the stuff sitting in my dresser drawer; one prescription from 1985. I don’t know what the fuss was all about; it never did that much for me.
Current consumption of my PC puts me right at 35 mg / 3500 mg. One more tablet a day will max me out. Care to guess what one of my questions to my doctor on Wednesday will be?
Edit: Added schedule change!
Sunday, September 30, 2007
Boxes, Boxes, Everywhere!!
Since Ben is staying with me, I don’t feel that it is necessary for me to post early every morning. I’m not sure that it is necessary for me to post every day. What do you think?
~~~~~~~~~~~~
I was 189 this AM; I’m starting to feel like a little piggie. I think that some of my weight gain is water retention; my legs feel somewhat swollen. Then again, maybe it’s that time of the month.
~~~~~~~~~~~
I mowed the lawn today. My goal is to get the lawn as short as possible before the leaves start to fall. That way, the wind will blow the leaves off my lawn and onto the neighbor’s lawn. Since the “neighbor” is the local hospital, their yard crew can mow the leaves into a mulch, for all I care. I won’t have to rake too much at all, then.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
We had a scare today. We couldn’t find Himmy! We searched the house high and low; no Himmy.
Since I’d been in and out throughout the day, I thought that maybe I’d let him get out somehow. I was sick!
Ben was looking all over the back yard, going along the hedgerows searching for his cat. Since I needed to pick up some Humpty Dumpty eggs which the local gas station sells, I walked over, got my eggs, and asked if they had seen a cat. They mentioned there was a black one, dead in the road, near the Men’s Mall. But Himmy isn’t black, I thought.
But, with a sinking feeling in my stomach—maybe that was there all along, now that I think about it—I walked over to check out the corpse. Thank God it wasn’t Himmy. So where was Himmy!!
Now, it’s possible that he got caught in one of the rooms upstairs. Although we searched every room, we left the doors open in case he was well hidden and locked in.
But I still felt that he was down stairs.
I was looking everywhere downstairs for the umpteenth time. I got to three empty boxes, stacked one atop the other, when I noticed something amiss with the bottom box. Now you have to understand, this box was only about six inches wider than the two boxes stacked on top of it. But, apparently, it was wide enough. Himmy was hiding (sleeping) inside the bottom box and all I caught was just a glimpse of his cheek.
What a relief to find him! I thought that I’d done something wrong and he’d gotten away.
~~~~~~~~~~~
Finally, Cuz asked about my pillboxes so I thought I’d elaborate.
I now have two types of pillboxes. The first I’ve had for some time; a weeks worth of compartments, Sunday through Saturday with an AM and a PM compartment for each day; for a total of 14 compartments.
The second is a simple one compartment for each day of the week type of box. However, I’ve set it up for my doses during the day. I put a label on each compartment for the hour of the dose. They are numbered, in order, 10AM, 2PM, 6PM, 10PM, 2AM, and 6AM. The seventh compartment is a blank label.
I figure that I’ll load the hourly pillbox sometime between 6AM and 10AM with my PC and the contents of the weekly pillbox. I put my PC in each compartment and my Protonix and blood pressure meds from the weekly pillbox into the 6AM and 6PM compartments of the hourly pillbox.
I did take a photo of the two boxes, the weekly
box and the daily box. As you can see from the open lids on the weekly box, both Sunday AM and PM, and the Monday AM compartments are empty. Those meds have been transferred to the daily box. Since it’s after 6PM on Sunday, I’ve taken blood pressure meds and the Protonix from the Sunday PM compartment that was transferred to the 6PM compartment in the hourly pillbox.
Since it’s not yet 10PM, the rest of the compartments are closed. Now, I don’t normally leave the compartments open after I take the pills. That was just for this photo opportunity.
Does this make my process a little clearer?
~~~~~~~~~~~~
I was 189 this AM; I’m starting to feel like a little piggie. I think that some of my weight gain is water retention; my legs feel somewhat swollen. Then again, maybe it’s that time of the month.
~~~~~~~~~~~
I mowed the lawn today. My goal is to get the lawn as short as possible before the leaves start to fall. That way, the wind will blow the leaves off my lawn and onto the neighbor’s lawn. Since the “neighbor” is the local hospital, their yard crew can mow the leaves into a mulch, for all I care. I won’t have to rake too much at all, then.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
We had a scare today. We couldn’t find Himmy! We searched the house high and low; no Himmy.
Since I’d been in and out throughout the day, I thought that maybe I’d let him get out somehow. I was sick!
Ben was looking all over the back yard, going along the hedgerows searching for his cat. Since I needed to pick up some Humpty Dumpty eggs which the local gas station sells, I walked over, got my eggs, and asked if they had seen a cat. They mentioned there was a black one, dead in the road, near the Men’s Mall. But Himmy isn’t black, I thought.
But, with a sinking feeling in my stomach—maybe that was there all along, now that I think about it—I walked over to check out the corpse. Thank God it wasn’t Himmy. So where was Himmy!!
Now, it’s possible that he got caught in one of the rooms upstairs. Although we searched every room, we left the doors open in case he was well hidden and locked in.
But I still felt that he was down stairs.
I was looking everywhere downstairs for the umpteenth time. I got to three empty boxes, stacked one atop the other, when I noticed something amiss with the bottom box. Now you have to understand, this box was only about six inches wider than the two boxes stacked on top of it. But, apparently, it was wide enough. Himmy was hiding (sleeping) inside the bottom box and all I caught was just a glimpse of his cheek.
What a relief to find him! I thought that I’d done something wrong and he’d gotten away.
~~~~~~~~~~~
Finally, Cuz asked about my pillboxes so I thought I’d elaborate.
I now have two types of pillboxes. The first I’ve had for some time; a weeks worth of compartments, Sunday through Saturday with an AM and a PM compartment for each day; for a total of 14 compartments.
The second is a simple one compartment for each day of the week type of box. However, I’ve set it up for my doses during the day. I put a label on each compartment for the hour of the dose. They are numbered, in order, 10AM, 2PM, 6PM, 10PM, 2AM, and 6AM. The seventh compartment is a blank label.
I figure that I’ll load the hourly pillbox sometime between 6AM and 10AM with my PC and the contents of the weekly pillbox. I put my PC in each compartment and my Protonix and blood pressure meds from the weekly pillbox into the 6AM and 6PM compartments of the hourly pillbox.
I did take a photo of the two boxes, the weekly
box and the daily box. As you can see from the open lids on the weekly box, both Sunday AM and PM, and the Monday AM compartments are empty. Those meds have been transferred to the daily box. Since it’s after 6PM on Sunday, I’ve taken blood pressure meds and the Protonix from the Sunday PM compartment that was transferred to the 6PM compartment in the hourly pillbox.Since it’s not yet 10PM, the rest of the compartments are closed. Now, I don’t normally leave the compartments open after I take the pills. That was just for this photo opportunity.
Does this make my process a little clearer?
Saturday, September 29, 2007
It’s Amazing….
…what Packer Candy can do, especially when you don’t take it.
I’m feeling a lot better today, even though I got to bed late, again, last night. And I do believe that increased levels of PC causes insomnia for me. I just checked the side effects and didn’t see insomnia listed, but OMG! All the others possible; severe weakness, unusual fatigue, dry mouth and decreased appetite (didn’t I complain about these), muscle twitches, and decreased sex drive? Just what I need! :-D
And my new system for my pills seems to be working out well. At 11:30 this morning, I couldn’t remember if I had taken my 10:00AM meds. So I checked my pillbox for 10:00AM and sure enough, I’d forgotten my 10:00AM dose. Since I take pills so often, it’s hard to remember what I have and haven’t taken.
And BTW, I don’t need the M&Ms since I’m not currently taking any liquid meds.
~~~~~~~~
I don’t envy Ben his task of taking care of me.
I’ve been going through my files, getting rid of the paperwork I’ve accumulated over the last 40 years or so. I swear I have income tax returns from when I first started paying income tax. I have those carbon copies of almost all my checking accounts back to when they first became available.
I blame my grandparents for my habit. Having gone through the depression, even if it broke, they hung on to whatever the item was in hopes that it could be fixed at a later date, or parts from the item could be used to fix something else. I remember my grandfather’s “junk yard” back in the woods. He’d need a piece of steel a certain size and shape so he’d go out to the junk yard and look over all the stuff that was back there. Pretty soon, he’d come up with a piece that, with a little work, would suit his needs.
I’m the same way.
Anyway, I’ve been going through my files and finding that my files represent a different reality than the one I remember. All these years I thought that I needed three credits of Spanish to get my degree. Not! I need three credits of Arts and Humanities; art, music, or literature!! I still want to learn Spanish, but now I have to find a ways to attend A&H classes working a 12-hour day, four days on/ four days off schedule. Grrrrrr.
And, it seems that I have some stock that I didn’t know I had. The price per share on the certificate is $5 per share. I just checked; it’s up to $77 per share today. I’m going to have to find out what’s up with that! I don’t remember getting any stock, but my name is on it and it’s in my files!
And, I find that I have a small pension that I could be collecting on right now instead of waiting until I get to 65. Didn’t know that, either.
My memory is going, going, going, going… Did I mention that my memory is going?
~~~~~~~~
Well, I must be going out to pick up some more Packer Candy. According to the label directions, I can go through a big bottle in 6-1/4 days to 16-2/3 days. Ain’t life great?
I’m feeling a lot better today, even though I got to bed late, again, last night. And I do believe that increased levels of PC causes insomnia for me. I just checked the side effects and didn’t see insomnia listed, but OMG! All the others possible; severe weakness, unusual fatigue, dry mouth and decreased appetite (didn’t I complain about these), muscle twitches, and decreased sex drive? Just what I need! :-D
And my new system for my pills seems to be working out well. At 11:30 this morning, I couldn’t remember if I had taken my 10:00AM meds. So I checked my pillbox for 10:00AM and sure enough, I’d forgotten my 10:00AM dose. Since I take pills so often, it’s hard to remember what I have and haven’t taken.
And BTW, I don’t need the M&Ms since I’m not currently taking any liquid meds.
~~~~~~~~
I don’t envy Ben his task of taking care of me.
I’ve been going through my files, getting rid of the paperwork I’ve accumulated over the last 40 years or so. I swear I have income tax returns from when I first started paying income tax. I have those carbon copies of almost all my checking accounts back to when they first became available.
I blame my grandparents for my habit. Having gone through the depression, even if it broke, they hung on to whatever the item was in hopes that it could be fixed at a later date, or parts from the item could be used to fix something else. I remember my grandfather’s “junk yard” back in the woods. He’d need a piece of steel a certain size and shape so he’d go out to the junk yard and look over all the stuff that was back there. Pretty soon, he’d come up with a piece that, with a little work, would suit his needs.
I’m the same way.
Anyway, I’ve been going through my files and finding that my files represent a different reality than the one I remember. All these years I thought that I needed three credits of Spanish to get my degree. Not! I need three credits of Arts and Humanities; art, music, or literature!! I still want to learn Spanish, but now I have to find a ways to attend A&H classes working a 12-hour day, four days on/ four days off schedule. Grrrrrr.
And, it seems that I have some stock that I didn’t know I had. The price per share on the certificate is $5 per share. I just checked; it’s up to $77 per share today. I’m going to have to find out what’s up with that! I don’t remember getting any stock, but my name is on it and it’s in my files!
And, I find that I have a small pension that I could be collecting on right now instead of waiting until I get to 65. Didn’t know that, either.
My memory is going, going, going, going… Did I mention that my memory is going?
~~~~~~~~
Well, I must be going out to pick up some more Packer Candy. According to the label directions, I can go through a big bottle in 6-1/4 days to 16-2/3 days. Ain’t life great?
Friday, September 28, 2007
Some Days You’re the Bug!
Sorry I haven’t posted any earlier today; I didn’t realize how fragile my condition is.
You see, I went to bed relatively late last night: midnight. I’d been up going through my old files, getting rid of stuff that I’ll never need again. Sorting and shredding; shredding and sorting.
Anyway, I slept through my alarm for my 2:00AM meds and didn’t wake up until 5:30AM. So I didn’t get my overnight double dose of PC. Being tired and not thinking clearly, I just took my normal single dose for my 6:00AM meds. Apparently, that wasn’t good enough. So, I’ve felt poorly all morning, along with a very specific point of pain.
So, you know I feel bad when I don’t even want to post to my blog! As the saying goes, “Some days you’re the windshield; some days you’re the bug.” Today, I’m the bug.
You see, I went to bed relatively late last night: midnight. I’d been up going through my old files, getting rid of stuff that I’ll never need again. Sorting and shredding; shredding and sorting.
Anyway, I slept through my alarm for my 2:00AM meds and didn’t wake up until 5:30AM. So I didn’t get my overnight double dose of PC. Being tired and not thinking clearly, I just took my normal single dose for my 6:00AM meds. Apparently, that wasn’t good enough. So, I’ve felt poorly all morning, along with a very specific point of pain.
So, you know I feel bad when I don’t even want to post to my blog! As the saying goes, “Some days you’re the windshield; some days you’re the bug.” Today, I’m the bug.
Oh, I picked up another pill box to load my pills in for the day, by the hours I'm supposed to take them. That way, I'll know if I took my meds in the middle of the night and forgot about it, or not. Now, where's those darn M&Ms? :-)
~~~~~~~~
I shaved yesterday. My beard was getting patchy from all the hair falling out so I decided it was time. Especially after seeing my beard all over my keyboard.
Gosh, do I look different! I’ll wait until more of the hair on my head falls out before I shave that and then I’ll post a pic. But Amy, prepare yourself for the horror! Maybe it's time for my mask.
Speaking of my hair, I was wearing black fleece yesterday when I took a walk over to the Men’s Mall. I happened to look at my shoulders out in the sun. All the white hair shining on that black fleece nearly blinded me. I couldn’t believe it hadn’t all fallen out from the looks of my shoulders. So, after some violent brushing, I decided I could proceed with my errand.
I’m going to go eat, now, and watch Young Frankenstein. I mentioned before it had been recommended to me, and since “laughter is the best medicine” I was hoping it could help me today.
I may get back to this later today.
~~~~~~~~
I shaved yesterday. My beard was getting patchy from all the hair falling out so I decided it was time. Especially after seeing my beard all over my keyboard.
Gosh, do I look different! I’ll wait until more of the hair on my head falls out before I shave that and then I’ll post a pic. But Amy, prepare yourself for the horror! Maybe it's time for my mask.
Speaking of my hair, I was wearing black fleece yesterday when I took a walk over to the Men’s Mall. I happened to look at my shoulders out in the sun. All the white hair shining on that black fleece nearly blinded me. I couldn’t believe it hadn’t all fallen out from the looks of my shoulders. So, after some violent brushing, I decided I could proceed with my errand.
I’m going to go eat, now, and watch Young Frankenstein. I mentioned before it had been recommended to me, and since “laughter is the best medicine” I was hoping it could help me today.
I may get back to this later today.
Thursday, September 27, 2007
Feliz Cumpleaños!
Well. I guess I didn’t run into the person yesterday’s horoscope warned me about, although Nettie did direct me to where I could find someone like that.
Speaking of Nettie, in case you missed her comment on the You Know Who You Are post, she’s a grandma again. Her daughter had a bouncing baby boy, Emerson, on Tuesday, September 25. To quote grandma, “He weighed in at 6 lb. 11 oz. and was 20 1/2 inches long. He's absolutely perfect! Very alert.”
So, in honor of the occasion, and after waiting to garner permissions to use the photos, I’d like to present Nettie, her grandson Tommie (who gave me a good-bye kiss when he was in town last year. I told you there was kissing going on!), and her newest grandson, Emerson.
Now, grandma is a very busy person. Quite frankly I don’t see how she keeps up with everything she does. You see, Nettie is also a quilter; she makes quilts. I’m including a picture of Emerson’s nursery that grandma had a big hand in helping decorate.
I stand in awe. Ok, I’m actually sitting in awe, but she still impresses the heck outa me with all the quilts she’s produced. And BTW, that's Brianna in the lower left, second grandchild and first granddaughter.
~~~~~~~~~~
It’s kinda funny. Back when I wasn’t eating, my rheumatism went away. Now that I’m eating again, the rheumatism, and the pain associated with it, came back.
So, it would sound to me like rheumatism is a food-based auto-immune system response to something in my diet.
I’m going to have to pursue that line of thought.
~~~~~~~~~~
In case you didn’t catch Ronny’s comment, he and Cuzanne have purchased tickets to the States. They’ll be landing in Chicago on December 22.
Welcome home, guys!
~~~~~~~
Finally, if you’re wondering what the title of this post means, it says “Happy Birthday.” Yes, it refers in part to Emerson’s birth on Tuesday. But it also refers to another birth that was very near and dear to me 29 years ago.
When my son was born 31 years ago, they didn’t allow fathers in the delivery room. I’ve always regretted not being there to welcome my son into this world; the chance to start bonding at the very beginning.
So, when my daughter was born, they couldn’t keep me away. The doctor was understandably concerned that an expectant father might be a little queasy about the goings-on in the delivery room. The expectant mother soon put those fears to rest, however. She told the doctor that the father had spent time on the farm and that if she just “moo-ed” a little bit, he’d feel right at home.
That doctor nearly fell off his stool he was laughing so hard.
And the expectant father did just fine. He watched, in amazement, as his first daughter made her appearance into this world. He marveled that she didn’t cry unless folks were messing with her. When they stopped cleaning her up, she stopped fussing, and started looking all around the room, taking it all in.
My daughter continues to amaze me.
Happy Birthday, Amy!
Speaking of Nettie, in case you missed her comment on the You Know Who You Are post, she’s a grandma again. Her daughter had a bouncing baby boy, Emerson, on Tuesday, September 25. To quote grandma, “He weighed in at 6 lb. 11 oz. and was 20 1/2 inches long. He's absolutely perfect! Very alert.”
So, in honor of the occasion, and after waiting to garner permissions to use the photos, I’d like to present Nettie, her grandson Tommie (who gave me a good-bye kiss when he was in town last year. I told you there was kissing going on!), and her newest grandson, Emerson.
Now, grandma is a very busy person. Quite frankly I don’t see how she keeps up with everything she does. You see, Nettie is also a quilter; she makes quilts. I’m including a picture of Emerson’s nursery that grandma had a big hand in helping decorate.
I stand in awe. Ok, I’m actually sitting in awe, but she still impresses the heck outa me with all the quilts she’s produced. And BTW, that's Brianna in the lower left, second grandchild and first granddaughter.
~~~~~~~~~~
It’s kinda funny. Back when I wasn’t eating, my rheumatism went away. Now that I’m eating again, the rheumatism, and the pain associated with it, came back.
So, it would sound to me like rheumatism is a food-based auto-immune system response to something in my diet.
I’m going to have to pursue that line of thought.
~~~~~~~~~~
In case you didn’t catch Ronny’s comment, he and Cuzanne have purchased tickets to the States. They’ll be landing in Chicago on December 22.
Welcome home, guys!
~~~~~~~
Finally, if you’re wondering what the title of this post means, it says “Happy Birthday.” Yes, it refers in part to Emerson’s birth on Tuesday. But it also refers to another birth that was very near and dear to me 29 years ago.
When my son was born 31 years ago, they didn’t allow fathers in the delivery room. I’ve always regretted not being there to welcome my son into this world; the chance to start bonding at the very beginning.
So, when my daughter was born, they couldn’t keep me away. The doctor was understandably concerned that an expectant father might be a little queasy about the goings-on in the delivery room. The expectant mother soon put those fears to rest, however. She told the doctor that the father had spent time on the farm and that if she just “moo-ed” a little bit, he’d feel right at home.
That doctor nearly fell off his stool he was laughing so hard.
And the expectant father did just fine. He watched, in amazement, as his first daughter made her appearance into this world. He marveled that she didn’t cry unless folks were messing with her. When they stopped cleaning her up, she stopped fussing, and started looking all around the room, taking it all in.
My daughter continues to amaze me.
Happy Birthday, Amy!
Wednesday, September 26, 2007
You Know Who You Are
I’m still 185 pounds. But I’ve been sleeping well, going to bed about 10:00PM, taking my PC at 2:00AM, and getting up for the day about 7:00AM. I’ve cut back on my PC to do it. Oh, I’m getting enough, thank you. I’m just not doubling up unless there is a need.
During the day, when I’m eating, as long as I don’t eat something that will bother the tumor in my stomach, I can get by with one PC every four hours or so. And I feel fine. Overnight, when the stomach is empty, the tumor may get a bit irritated so I will take 2 PC at 2:00AM to ease the pain.
Now that I’m not having to eat all the time or having to take my meds with creamy chocolate milk just to get the horse pills down, I may start up the Carafate again. The doc had said that I could stop, that the window of usefulness may have passed. But if the tumor can still get irritated, that window may still be open. I’ll have to make a call today about it.
~~~~~~
Let’s talk about eating! I had Papa Murphy’s Barbeque Chicken pizza yesterday. I haven’t been to the fridge yet to see if Ben had any last night after coming home from work, but I’m sure there’s still a piece or two in there. It’s not like I remember, but still pretty good.
Of course, there are two kinds of ice cream in the freezer. As I mentioned earlier, one of the oncologists did make mention that Ice Cream could very well become my best friend!
And, I have a craving for cheesecake. Those of you who know me, know about my passion for cheesecake! Ben and I had talked about cheesecake recently; so I bought a cheesecake sampler pack yesterday. Not very good at all. But did I mention that it’s cheesecake?
And did I mention that I’m still 185 pounds.
~~~~~~
“Long-haired, bearded, hippie, dope-fiend freak!”
I’m afraid the time is long past that I will ever hear such words of endearment attributed to me again, although there once was a time. Oh, when I was in high school, I was a proto-typical son of the Midwest. Then came The Awakening in college.
I grew my hair long in college. Although few photos survive from that time period, I do remember when the college wanted to kick all of us long-hairs out! I remember Marilyn, a nice Amish girl that I worked with in the kitchen, pleading with me to not cut my hair. I even went to the ACLU and found that even though The College could kick me out, The ACLU could get me re-instated, guaranteed!
Now, I had nothing invested in my long hair, it was just an experiment to see what it felt like to have and care for long hair. It was more an exercise in individuality than anything else; individuality The College didn’t want me to develop. I wonder why….
I folded; I trimmed my hair to the maximum allowable length, and continued to get in trouble with The College with my developing individuality.
Now, due to chemotherapy, I’m losing all my hair. I can’t say that I’m looking forward to it.
I’ve worn my hair short now for a few years; it’s just plain easier to take care of. And with the big bald spot on top, it looks better than with the ponytail that a friend, Carla, always wanted to cut off.
Most of my beard is loose right now. I figure that it won’t stay in much longer. I guess I’ll wait until it starts to look ratty and then I’ll shave it. The same goes for what hair is left on the top of my head.
I don’t know how this will affect my self-image. I’m waiting to see.
~~~~~~~~
From today’s Horoscope:
During the day, when I’m eating, as long as I don’t eat something that will bother the tumor in my stomach, I can get by with one PC every four hours or so. And I feel fine. Overnight, when the stomach is empty, the tumor may get a bit irritated so I will take 2 PC at 2:00AM to ease the pain.
Now that I’m not having to eat all the time or having to take my meds with creamy chocolate milk just to get the horse pills down, I may start up the Carafate again. The doc had said that I could stop, that the window of usefulness may have passed. But if the tumor can still get irritated, that window may still be open. I’ll have to make a call today about it.
~~~~~~
Let’s talk about eating! I had Papa Murphy’s Barbeque Chicken pizza yesterday. I haven’t been to the fridge yet to see if Ben had any last night after coming home from work, but I’m sure there’s still a piece or two in there. It’s not like I remember, but still pretty good.
Of course, there are two kinds of ice cream in the freezer. As I mentioned earlier, one of the oncologists did make mention that Ice Cream could very well become my best friend!
And, I have a craving for cheesecake. Those of you who know me, know about my passion for cheesecake! Ben and I had talked about cheesecake recently; so I bought a cheesecake sampler pack yesterday. Not very good at all. But did I mention that it’s cheesecake?
And did I mention that I’m still 185 pounds.
~~~~~~
“Long-haired, bearded, hippie, dope-fiend freak!”
I’m afraid the time is long past that I will ever hear such words of endearment attributed to me again, although there once was a time. Oh, when I was in high school, I was a proto-typical son of the Midwest. Then came The Awakening in college.
I grew my hair long in college. Although few photos survive from that time period, I do remember when the college wanted to kick all of us long-hairs out! I remember Marilyn, a nice Amish girl that I worked with in the kitchen, pleading with me to not cut my hair. I even went to the ACLU and found that even though The College could kick me out, The ACLU could get me re-instated, guaranteed!
Now, I had nothing invested in my long hair, it was just an experiment to see what it felt like to have and care for long hair. It was more an exercise in individuality than anything else; individuality The College didn’t want me to develop. I wonder why….
I folded; I trimmed my hair to the maximum allowable length, and continued to get in trouble with The College with my developing individuality.
Now, due to chemotherapy, I’m losing all my hair. I can’t say that I’m looking forward to it.
I’ve worn my hair short now for a few years; it’s just plain easier to take care of. And with the big bald spot on top, it looks better than with the ponytail that a friend, Carla, always wanted to cut off.
Most of my beard is loose right now. I figure that it won’t stay in much longer. I guess I’ll wait until it starts to look ratty and then I’ll shave it. The same goes for what hair is left on the top of my head.
I don’t know how this will affect my self-image. I’m waiting to see.
~~~~~~~~
From today’s Horoscope:
“Today you'll come face to face with someone whose delusions of grandeur will
entertain and amuse you. They have a dramatically different view of reality than
you do, and could serve as a cautionary tale. By living beyond their financial
abilities, they are setting themselves up for a serious fall. Any of your advice
will fall on deaf ears, so don't even try to encourage them to be careful with
their money. Just let them live their life and make their mistakes.”
OK, maybe you won’t know who you are.
Tuesday, September 25, 2007
I’m Finally Losing It!
My hair, that is!
Because of the mouth sores, I’ve been losing some dead skin from my lips. So, naturally, I’ve been picking the loose skin off my lips with my teeth. As a result, I started wondering why I’ve been getting so much hair from my beard in my mouth. An occasional piece I can understand, but not this much.
So I started to investigate.
I find that I can pinch my beard and with very little effort pull out a clump of hair. It’s the same with some spots on my head and chest.
I had thought that some morning I’d wake up and find that I’d have to vacuum the bed. But apparently, I’m going to lose my hair a little slower than that. So, it may be today, or tomorrow, whenever it bugs me, but I’m going to buzz it all off and then shave it. That way, it won’t show up as bald patches.
Life goes on, here!
Because of the mouth sores, I’ve been losing some dead skin from my lips. So, naturally, I’ve been picking the loose skin off my lips with my teeth. As a result, I started wondering why I’ve been getting so much hair from my beard in my mouth. An occasional piece I can understand, but not this much.
So I started to investigate.
I find that I can pinch my beard and with very little effort pull out a clump of hair. It’s the same with some spots on my head and chest.
I had thought that some morning I’d wake up and find that I’d have to vacuum the bed. But apparently, I’m going to lose my hair a little slower than that. So, it may be today, or tomorrow, whenever it bugs me, but I’m going to buzz it all off and then shave it. That way, it won’t show up as bald patches.
Life goes on, here!
Monday, September 24, 2007
Fritz, the Cat
That’s it! I’m going to have to go on a diet. I hit 181 pounds this morning. That’s six pounds up from the recent basement!
~~~~~~~~~~
I never was much of one for reading horoscopes; that is, until Robin, that is. I started to pay attention to them, then, and have ever since. At a minimum, they’re harmless fun. And, I might learn something useful from them as well.
Take today’s horoscope for instance:
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Ben and I stayed up late last night watching movies. And, I slept very well afterward.
One of those family traditions that I’ve always enjoyed with the kids was watching movies. When we go to Florida on vacation, we still try to take in at least one movie in the theater. I remember watching movies like Dirty Dancing: Havana Nights in the University Square Mall with my daughter (I think Ben Begged off that one) and treasure those moments. And, we would rent movies and watch one or two at home, which is why I’m now looking forward to a Shrek Marathon.
So, watching movies at home last night with Ben was a continuation of that tradition. That’s not to say that Ben and I don’t go out occasionally to see something in the theater; we do. But just sitting around the house last night was nice.
We watched 300, a movie that I’d been wanting to see for some time about King Leonidas and the Spartan stand at Thermopylae.
We also watched Aqua Teen Hunger Force. It was somewhat interesting, but since I was up long past my normal bedtime, I fell asleep often during the movie. I guess you would have to be a fan to understand the movie.
I did find out reading the link for the movie that some characters from the movie, the Mooninites, were the subject of the guerilla marketing campaign featuring circuit boards with flashing LED lights that the Boston Police Department went nuts over in January of this year, reportedly spending over $1 Million dollars investigating the “bomb threat.” Boston was the only city of the ten major cities involved in the marketing campaign that overreacted.
See, I do learn things from my kids.
~~~~~~
As I said, I slept well. I was somewhat late taking my 10:00PM PC so I took only one, figuring I’d be taking another at 2:00AM. But somehow, I slept through the alarm, missing that dose. I woke up without ill effect at 5:30 to commune with Mother Nature and caught up with my dosing schedule. Then I fell back asleep and slept well until almost 10:00.
It’s looking like a pretty good day, people!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Nancy stopped by yesterday for a while. We talked about a variety of things and she taught me how to play Go Fish.
I can see I’m gonna have to run up North some weekend. I’ve been away for way too long. And BTW, Nancy, it was the North Country Inn we were trying to think of. See, all the stuff you can find on the Internet!!
~~~~~~~~~
As the “Blogger” here, I get notification when someone responds with a comment to one of my previous posts. I believe that if you were to sign up for an account with blogspot or with Gmail (something I highly recommend) that you would be able to get notifications of new posts, and possibly be notified of new comments too.
So, when I got up at 5:30AM, I checked my email and found that there was a response to my post “Comment Replies” from my sister, Lorie, concerning Fritz, the cute kitten/ cat that my “blushing bride” of nineteen brought to our marriage, he was on my mind as I fell asleep.
Now, “Fritz,” as the name for a cat, isn’t all that unusual. But, in this case, the timing is suspect.
You see, in the 60’s there was an underground comic book character called Fritz, the Cat. And, in 1972, an animated film was produced about that character.
What was so unusual about this film is quite simple:
Now, I was raised in a religion where everything was a sin, including frequenting the theater. You could watch a movie on TV, but you couldn’t see it in the theater without being in jeopardy of going to Hell. And Heaven help you if you got caught going to the movies.
In 1972, I was going to that religion’s major College near Chicago. There were folks who would go down to the local theaters just to see if they could spot the college kids attending the local movies. They’d then squeal to the Dean about all “the sinnin’ goin’ on in town.”
However, it was nothing to go to the theaters in Chicago and see the college’s administrative people, even the Dean himself, standing in line outside the big city theaters.
In ’72, I believe I was spending more time in the Dean’s office than I was in class.
Now, Kris’ friend, Michelle, swore that the movie had nothing to do with the naming of the cute little kitten that group of teenaged girls gave to their friend, Kris, in late ’72 or early ’73.
Yeah, RIGHT!
So Fritz, that cute little bundle of fur that eventually grew up into the cat with so much character, became much more than a cat to me. He became an icon for that entire period in my life. It still surprises me the strong emotions that the mention of that cat evokes when I think about him.
Rest in Peace, Fritz. We still love you!
~~~~~~~~~~
I never was much of one for reading horoscopes; that is, until Robin, that is. I started to pay attention to them, then, and have ever since. At a minimum, they’re harmless fun. And, I might learn something useful from them as well.
Take today’s horoscope for instance:
“You need to start understanding that expressing yourself is necessary to get you to the next level of happiness. In other words, for a healthier life, you need to share your feelings -- no matter what they are. So today, whenever you feel something, express it in the most original and creative way you can. Singing, dancing, cooking or even just goofing around are all great ways to display how you're feeling. If you keep your emotions inside or mask them, you'll be wasting your time.”I’m not saying there’s going to be any dancing going on, today, but you never know…..
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Ben and I stayed up late last night watching movies. And, I slept very well afterward.
One of those family traditions that I’ve always enjoyed with the kids was watching movies. When we go to Florida on vacation, we still try to take in at least one movie in the theater. I remember watching movies like Dirty Dancing: Havana Nights in the University Square Mall with my daughter (I think Ben Begged off that one) and treasure those moments. And, we would rent movies and watch one or two at home, which is why I’m now looking forward to a Shrek Marathon.
So, watching movies at home last night with Ben was a continuation of that tradition. That’s not to say that Ben and I don’t go out occasionally to see something in the theater; we do. But just sitting around the house last night was nice.
We watched 300, a movie that I’d been wanting to see for some time about King Leonidas and the Spartan stand at Thermopylae.
We also watched Aqua Teen Hunger Force. It was somewhat interesting, but since I was up long past my normal bedtime, I fell asleep often during the movie. I guess you would have to be a fan to understand the movie.
I did find out reading the link for the movie that some characters from the movie, the Mooninites, were the subject of the guerilla marketing campaign featuring circuit boards with flashing LED lights that the Boston Police Department went nuts over in January of this year, reportedly spending over $1 Million dollars investigating the “bomb threat.” Boston was the only city of the ten major cities involved in the marketing campaign that overreacted.
See, I do learn things from my kids.
~~~~~~
As I said, I slept well. I was somewhat late taking my 10:00PM PC so I took only one, figuring I’d be taking another at 2:00AM. But somehow, I slept through the alarm, missing that dose. I woke up without ill effect at 5:30 to commune with Mother Nature and caught up with my dosing schedule. Then I fell back asleep and slept well until almost 10:00.
It’s looking like a pretty good day, people!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Nancy stopped by yesterday for a while. We talked about a variety of things and she taught me how to play Go Fish.
I can see I’m gonna have to run up North some weekend. I’ve been away for way too long. And BTW, Nancy, it was the North Country Inn we were trying to think of. See, all the stuff you can find on the Internet!!
~~~~~~~~~
As the “Blogger” here, I get notification when someone responds with a comment to one of my previous posts. I believe that if you were to sign up for an account with blogspot or with Gmail (something I highly recommend) that you would be able to get notifications of new posts, and possibly be notified of new comments too.
So, when I got up at 5:30AM, I checked my email and found that there was a response to my post “Comment Replies” from my sister, Lorie, concerning Fritz, the cute kitten/ cat that my “blushing bride” of nineteen brought to our marriage, he was on my mind as I fell asleep.
Now, “Fritz,” as the name for a cat, isn’t all that unusual. But, in this case, the timing is suspect.
You see, in the 60’s there was an underground comic book character called Fritz, the Cat. And, in 1972, an animated film was produced about that character.
What was so unusual about this film is quite simple:
“…the film was the first animated feature film to receive an X rating in the United States. It focuses on Fritz (voiced by Skip Hinnant), an anthropomorphic feline in the mid-1960s who seduces many female animals in New York City while staying one step ahead of the law. The film is a satire focusing on American college life of the era, race relations, the free love movement, and left- and right-wing politics. Fritz the Cat was the first independent animated film to gross more than $100 million at the box office.”I’d never seen a VHS copy of the film, but when the DVD became available in 2001, I scarfed it up immediately!!
Now, I was raised in a religion where everything was a sin, including frequenting the theater. You could watch a movie on TV, but you couldn’t see it in the theater without being in jeopardy of going to Hell. And Heaven help you if you got caught going to the movies.
In 1972, I was going to that religion’s major College near Chicago. There were folks who would go down to the local theaters just to see if they could spot the college kids attending the local movies. They’d then squeal to the Dean about all “the sinnin’ goin’ on in town.”
However, it was nothing to go to the theaters in Chicago and see the college’s administrative people, even the Dean himself, standing in line outside the big city theaters.
In ’72, I believe I was spending more time in the Dean’s office than I was in class.
Now, Kris’ friend, Michelle, swore that the movie had nothing to do with the naming of the cute little kitten that group of teenaged girls gave to their friend, Kris, in late ’72 or early ’73.
Yeah, RIGHT!
So Fritz, that cute little bundle of fur that eventually grew up into the cat with so much character, became much more than a cat to me. He became an icon for that entire period in my life. It still surprises me the strong emotions that the mention of that cat evokes when I think about him.
Rest in Peace, Fritz. We still love you!
Sunday, September 23, 2007
Urinary Tract Infections
This post is the set up for another upcoming post. I gotta think about something while waiting for sleep to overtake me!
Monday, April 19, 2004, at 5:19 in the morning, I’m crossing a cold, rain-swept parking lot at work, ready to start the first shift of my rotation when an Ottawa spotting truck comes whipping into the lot.
He isn’t supposed to be there. There is a building at the other end of the lot that sometimes needs to have trailers spotted, but not this morning. He’s there, in violation of company rules, to drop off his lunch box and gear, and to start his car so it will be warm when he leaves work in 25 minutes.
The spotter driver also has the habit of sitting with the seat almost on the floor, like the Mexican Low-Riders. And a computer blocks his right side windshield. So the driver can’t very well see anything near him, including pedestrians.
As I said, he comes whipping into the lot at about 15 - 20 mph and immediately makes a right hand turn, driving directly at me. I had time for three thoughts:
1. If he doesn’t see me, he’s going to hit me.
2. If he hits me, I’m going down.
3. If I go down, he’s gonna run over me.
Take another look at the photo of the Ottawa. I hit the truck right at the “O” in the word Ottawa on the bumper. My head, thankfully encased in a helmet, hit the sloping edge of the engine cover. I was knocked unconscious, thrown through the air 20 feet or so, at an angle that left me on the left side of the truck, coming to rest in a puddle of very cold rainwater. It was there that I regained consciousness.
The driver stopped next to me, got out of the truck, walked around me once saying, “You came out of nowhere! I didn’t even see you.” He got back in the truck, as I struggled to stand, and drove off, leaving me there to pick up my helmet that had been between his rear wheels!
I had to make all the calls to let my management know that I wouldn’t probably be finishing out the workday, ‘cause I was going to go to the ER, and proceeded to drive myself to the hospital.
And I never did get paid Workmen’s Comp for the week I was off.
I described that accident for two reasons. First, most folks visiting this blog haven’t heard about my encounter. And, that incident was the start of several decision-making processes.
For example, two weeks later, I came down with my first UTI (Urinary Tract Infection).
Now, I want to go on record right now as having apologized to my ex-, and any other woman who has ever had UTIs, for not being as sensitive to the realities of this condition as I should have. I firmly believe that all men should have to undergo at least one UTI just so they know what is going on when someone else has one.
For me, there was no pain. I did feel “bad” all over, but hey, I had just been run over; it comes with the territory. But, in addition to that, I was tired, shaky, and just plain washed out. I could work, but at half speed, if that. I just dragged myself around.
So off to the doctor I go to describe what is going on. As I said, I didn’t have any pain, at least not the way I define it.
The doctors always ask, “On a scale of 0 – 10, with 10 being the worst, how do you feel?”
For me, “10” is a “shot-in-the-stomach” gall bladder attack, where I would rather kneel along side the gurney, holding myself upright by my arms rather than lay down because laying down put the gall bladder up against the diaphragm which made it hurt even more.
And if “0” is perfectly normal, then “0 to 1” simply indicates sensation. No pain, just “not-normal” feeling. “1 to 2” then represents the beginnings of discomfort. Anything over 2 starts to describe “pain.” Tennis elbow might get to be a subjective “4” but it could never reach a “10” unless my arm was cut off at the elbow. But then, the pain becomes evident and there is no need for silly scales.
So, here I am with a UTI, trying to convince the doctor that something is wrong with me. I had to lie! I had unusual “sensation” upon urination but it never reached the level of “discomfort,” much less “pain.” But I knew what the symptoms that the doctor would be looking for, for the conditions I was describing. So I lied; I said that I had “pain upon urination.”
That got results. Sure enough, one midstream urine sample later, cloudy BTW, and I was prescribed the necessary antibiotics to treat and cure the infection.
So, I try to accurately describe what is going on with me, but that’s not what the doctors seem to respond to. They have their own language that they respond to. If you don’t meet the textbook symptoms you have a tendency to get ignored. I’m finding that out, again.
So, I’m finding I have to translate what I feel into “doctorspeak,” exaggerating symptoms just to facilitate communication.
That’s what my future post will be attempting to do, inform you what’s going on while describing it well enough so that the medical profession can understand as well.
Monday, April 19, 2004, at 5:19 in the morning, I’m crossing a cold, rain-swept parking lot at work, ready to start the first shift of my rotation when an Ottawa spotting truck comes whipping into the lot.
He isn’t supposed to be there. There is a building at the other end of the lot that sometimes needs to have trailers spotted, but not this morning. He’s there, in violation of company rules, to drop off his lunch box and gear, and to start his car so it will be warm when he leaves work in 25 minutes.
The spotter driver also has the habit of sitting with the seat almost on the floor, like the Mexican Low-Riders. And a computer blocks his right side windshield. So the driver can’t very well see anything near him, including pedestrians.
As I said, he comes whipping into the lot at about 15 - 20 mph and immediately makes a right hand turn, driving directly at me. I had time for three thoughts:
1. If he doesn’t see me, he’s going to hit me.
2. If he hits me, I’m going down.
3. If I go down, he’s gonna run over me.
Take another look at the photo of the Ottawa. I hit the truck right at the “O” in the word Ottawa on the bumper. My head, thankfully encased in a helmet, hit the sloping edge of the engine cover. I was knocked unconscious, thrown through the air 20 feet or so, at an angle that left me on the left side of the truck, coming to rest in a puddle of very cold rainwater. It was there that I regained consciousness.
The driver stopped next to me, got out of the truck, walked around me once saying, “You came out of nowhere! I didn’t even see you.” He got back in the truck, as I struggled to stand, and drove off, leaving me there to pick up my helmet that had been between his rear wheels!
I had to make all the calls to let my management know that I wouldn’t probably be finishing out the workday, ‘cause I was going to go to the ER, and proceeded to drive myself to the hospital.
And I never did get paid Workmen’s Comp for the week I was off.
I described that accident for two reasons. First, most folks visiting this blog haven’t heard about my encounter. And, that incident was the start of several decision-making processes.
For example, two weeks later, I came down with my first UTI (Urinary Tract Infection).
Now, I want to go on record right now as having apologized to my ex-, and any other woman who has ever had UTIs, for not being as sensitive to the realities of this condition as I should have. I firmly believe that all men should have to undergo at least one UTI just so they know what is going on when someone else has one.
For me, there was no pain. I did feel “bad” all over, but hey, I had just been run over; it comes with the territory. But, in addition to that, I was tired, shaky, and just plain washed out. I could work, but at half speed, if that. I just dragged myself around.
So off to the doctor I go to describe what is going on. As I said, I didn’t have any pain, at least not the way I define it.
The doctors always ask, “On a scale of 0 – 10, with 10 being the worst, how do you feel?”
For me, “10” is a “shot-in-the-stomach” gall bladder attack, where I would rather kneel along side the gurney, holding myself upright by my arms rather than lay down because laying down put the gall bladder up against the diaphragm which made it hurt even more.
And if “0” is perfectly normal, then “0 to 1” simply indicates sensation. No pain, just “not-normal” feeling. “1 to 2” then represents the beginnings of discomfort. Anything over 2 starts to describe “pain.” Tennis elbow might get to be a subjective “4” but it could never reach a “10” unless my arm was cut off at the elbow. But then, the pain becomes evident and there is no need for silly scales.
So, here I am with a UTI, trying to convince the doctor that something is wrong with me. I had to lie! I had unusual “sensation” upon urination but it never reached the level of “discomfort,” much less “pain.” But I knew what the symptoms that the doctor would be looking for, for the conditions I was describing. So I lied; I said that I had “pain upon urination.”
That got results. Sure enough, one midstream urine sample later, cloudy BTW, and I was prescribed the necessary antibiotics to treat and cure the infection.
So, I try to accurately describe what is going on with me, but that’s not what the doctors seem to respond to. They have their own language that they respond to. If you don’t meet the textbook symptoms you have a tendency to get ignored. I’m finding that out, again.
So, I’m finding I have to translate what I feel into “doctorspeak,” exaggerating symptoms just to facilitate communication.
That’s what my future post will be attempting to do, inform you what’s going on while describing it well enough so that the medical profession can understand as well.
All I wanted was Vitamin C!
Luckily it wasn't this bad when I wanted just to take 2 grams of Vitamin C a day.
But I did have to talk like a good fellow just to get my oncologist to allow me to take it. Imagine what would have happened if I had mentioned "mercury."
But I did have to talk like a good fellow just to get my oncologist to allow me to take it. Imagine what would have happened if I had mentioned "mercury."
Saturday, September 22, 2007
Another Sleepless Night
I don’t understand why I’m not sleeping well. I don’t think my tea has THAT much caffeine. But I went to bed about 9:00PM after taking a couple of PCs (Packer Candy). Then I toss, and turn, and end up thinking a lot!
Last night I thought about the pain issue. I’m supposed to take the PCs ‘as necessary.’ The only way to determine “necessity” is to actually feel pain, right. So, instead of taking the two PCs I would normally have at my 2:00AM feeding, I took one.
Remarkably, I dropped off to sleep and a rather vivid dream that I felt that I have had before. You ever get those?
Did the same thing at 6:00AM with the same results. Different dream, though.
By 10:00, I was starting to feel stomach pain, so I went back to a double dose. But by then, I was still pretty tuckered. I’ve picked all the branches off the lawn, but haven’t gotten up the gumption to actually mow it. Maybe later today.
The doc yesterday was pleased with my progress, but informs me that my next round of chemo will be cut by 20%. So, I should feel somewhat better. And I’ll be going into it better hydrated and fed. I’m actually eating solid food.
Ben and I ran out to Fazoli’s for a quick lunch yesterday to celebrate. I had the Grilled Chicken Panini. It was pretty good. I regretted the Italian Ice, though; too acidy!
My doc took me off the antibiotic because my WBCs were way up; but he confused me with his reasoning. He said they were cutting my course of treatment short because they don’t want to develop a Levaquin-resistant organism. Historically, and logically, you would want to take the full course of treatment to kill all the bad organisms in the body, eliminating any survivors that might develop resistance. Talk about shaking my confidence….
I may have to get a tattoo. Seems the vein in my left hand, although looking like a “good” vein for use actually has a “knot” in it, making a lot of in and out, side to side, playing with the needle just to draw blood. I still have a bulge there today. So I’ll get a Do Not Use tattoo over that vein! Or not.
Other than that, I have to start documenting actual food consumption. And I want to continue the first post about how this all got started. I still don’t think Amy, the nutritionist, and the doctor understand the pain issue surrounding the eating issue. But you’ll see it here, and then I’ll print it out for their consumption.
Later.
Last night I thought about the pain issue. I’m supposed to take the PCs ‘as necessary.’ The only way to determine “necessity” is to actually feel pain, right. So, instead of taking the two PCs I would normally have at my 2:00AM feeding, I took one.
Remarkably, I dropped off to sleep and a rather vivid dream that I felt that I have had before. You ever get those?
Did the same thing at 6:00AM with the same results. Different dream, though.
By 10:00, I was starting to feel stomach pain, so I went back to a double dose. But by then, I was still pretty tuckered. I’ve picked all the branches off the lawn, but haven’t gotten up the gumption to actually mow it. Maybe later today.
The doc yesterday was pleased with my progress, but informs me that my next round of chemo will be cut by 20%. So, I should feel somewhat better. And I’ll be going into it better hydrated and fed. I’m actually eating solid food.
Ben and I ran out to Fazoli’s for a quick lunch yesterday to celebrate. I had the Grilled Chicken Panini. It was pretty good. I regretted the Italian Ice, though; too acidy!
My doc took me off the antibiotic because my WBCs were way up; but he confused me with his reasoning. He said they were cutting my course of treatment short because they don’t want to develop a Levaquin-resistant organism. Historically, and logically, you would want to take the full course of treatment to kill all the bad organisms in the body, eliminating any survivors that might develop resistance. Talk about shaking my confidence….
I may have to get a tattoo. Seems the vein in my left hand, although looking like a “good” vein for use actually has a “knot” in it, making a lot of in and out, side to side, playing with the needle just to draw blood. I still have a bulge there today. So I’ll get a Do Not Use tattoo over that vein! Or not.
Other than that, I have to start documenting actual food consumption. And I want to continue the first post about how this all got started. I still don’t think Amy, the nutritionist, and the doctor understand the pain issue surrounding the eating issue. But you’ll see it here, and then I’ll print it out for their consumption.
Later.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)