I Don’t Feel So Bad

I felt pretty good this morning, actually. I don’t usually get as verbose as I did unless I’m feeling good. I still had the fatigue, but I wasn’t as tired, and my mood was pretty good as well.

I went to radiation therapy and breezed right through it. I had to stop at Shopko to get a prescription refilled. Usually I get everything on the same schedule, so I can get them refilled all at once. It’s going to be a long while before I can do that again.

The consult was kinda funny. The pharmacist came over, looked at the prescription, started to ask if I had any questions, when she looked up into my face. Then she says, “Oh, I see it’s a refill.” Why is it that no eyebrows thing gives it away almost every time?

~~~~~~~~~

A couple of weeks ago, Ben and I were in the kitchen when I happened to actually look at my fingernails. There were four strange ridges going across the nail. It looked like a corduroy road, or am I dating myself here?

We surmised that it was due to the chemotherapy. Every session kills fast growing cells and probably slows down the rest of them for some time to come. Should work the same way for the nail bed.

So I started paying attention when I went in to the clinic, and sure enough, there were more than enough nails that looked like mine. It's interesting when I see the same nails on a nurse. I know that she knows exactly how I feel.

Back to the Internet to do some research. It turns out that the lines are called Beau’s Lines. The photo only show one line, so you’ll have to imagine what four lines look like. It seems like I learn something new every day.

Now, if I had only gone with Amy to get that pedicure, I might have learned something back around Christmas time!!!! :-P

~~~~~~~~~

After I got my prescription at Shopko, I wandered over to the junk food aisle to see if there was anything worth taking home for lunch. Then I remembered my daughter recently sending some candy home to Ben and I as a belated St. Valentine’s Day present. Hershey’s Kisses. New York Cheesecake KISSES!!!!! BTW, Amy, they were the first thing I sampled!!! I can tell that when I get my taste back, they will be a favorite!

More than six different bags of chocolate, and I can barely tell the difference in taste.

Anyway, I wanted to see if they were here in Wisconsin. I couldn’t find ‘em. But I did find something else. I finally found Green & Black Organic Chocolates!! We had tried them the last time we were in Tampa, as I recall. Shopko didn’t have my favorite, the Ginger (60% cocoa with crystallized ginger) but they did have another favorite, the Maya Gold (55% cocoa with orange, cinnamon, and vanilla).

I bought two bars, one for Ben and one that is half gone. We’re talking 100 grams of chocolate here! I keep waiting for the flavor I remember to magically appear in my mouth. But I can barely taste the orange. That’s why I was looking for the Ginger. There they at least have pieces of crystalized ginger root.

There was also a gift in the package for me that I’ll tell you about later.

~~~~~~~~~

Now I hope that you understand why I keep a close eye on, and drool over, Sunni’s Truffles. Right now, and apparently for some time to come, I can only imagine what they taste like. And I’d like to think that I had a (small) hand in her Inca Gold truffles. I added to the discussion about them on her site, back when she was just getting started making them!! The only thing missing IMHO is the café! But, I can’t offer suggestions for something that I haven’t tasted, and probably won’t be able to for quite some time.

Now, I’m not normally a caramel fan, but her Dirty Girls just might tempt me. Or maybe her Dressed Dirty Girls! How intriguing!

~~~~~~~~~

Oscar shared some photos of his kids out fishing last year, and the results of one of their trips that got mounted. Nice looking fish, and one proud kid! BTW, Oscar’s wife, Dee, is my resident expert on the Oneida language.

That got me missing my “woodsy ways.” So I dug out my CO2 Gamo P23 BB gun and the pellet trap I dug up last night. I loaded it with lead BBs and tried to hit the swinging plate targets in my trap. Ten BBs and I could count the number of times I hit a plate on one hand. Not a very happy camper.

So, I switched over to pellets; they should be more accurate. NOT! Or at least it didn’t seem that way. The first pellet went poot! I opened the action only to find the pellet still in the chamber. So I seated the pellet and tried again. At least this time I heard the pellet hit the trap. But I didn’t hit a target. I had to seat every pellet before it would fire. I don’t know what was wrong, and I’m too fatigued to try and find out tonight. But I thought it was me.

So, back to the basement I went, and dug up my old pump action .22 caliber Crosman pellet pistol. The first four pellets through the old standby hit every size plate—there are three sizes—and hit the smallest one twice. I still got it!

So, I don’t feel so bad.

It may not seem like much to you, but when I lose my taste, lose feeling in my feet and hands, lose some of my hearing, and have a continuous ringing in my ears that won’t go away, when I sometimes have trouble understanding what I read, when I sometimes have trouble expressing what I mean, when I can’t trust my muscles for very long without them starting to shake, it’s simple things like controlling a pellet pistol that gives me hope.

So, I don’t feel so bad, now.

Kunolunkwa, y te quiero!

"As a juror, I will exercise my 1000-year-old duty to arrive at a verdict, not just on the basis of the facts of a particular case, or instructions I am given, but through my power to reason, my knowledge of the Bill of Rights, and my individual conscience. When needful, I will judge the law itself." -L. Neil Smith